Test Fail

I have been having dreams about tests again.

The night before last I had a dream where I was in a classroom holding a stack of tests. I put my name on the test and was told that it was not time so I erased it. What was weird is that I could see a previously erased name in the same place where I had written my name. The message appears to be that I am either resistant or not ready for the “test” and that this is not uncommon.

Test Fail

Last night I dreamed of being inside a school. The hallways were narrow and brown in color and there were students coming and going. I was walking one way towards class and kept forgetting where I was going. I was also preoccupied with my cell phone because I had turned it on and it had malfunctioned. The malfunction was that there were ten times the number of icons on the screen than normal, most of which I was not familiar with. I could not find the text icon and when I did I got a list of other icons with it. It was very confusing. I showed the phone to a classmate, a tall, dark haired woman sitting by me. She said that I must have spilled something on the phone to cause it and that she could fix it for me. She handed me the phone and it had some moisture on the screen. For some reason her comment insulted me and I told her, “Never mind. I will figure it out for myself”.

In the hall a professor walked by me. He stopped me, waving a packet of paper in my face. He was my height with gray hair and I remember feeling nervous around him. He said, “It’s not looking good” in reference to how I had done so far on the test. He had not yet finished grading it, though.

I went to the classroom of this professor and waited outside the door. While I waited I glimpsed my reflection in a display and saw my hair was shorter than normal. Then I saw a list of classes posted. I began to read them to myself and noticed they were not classes I had ever taken before. The first one was, “Mechanisms of Micromanagement”. I read through the others on the list but cannot remember them all now. I do recall that they all had one thing in common – socialization and communication. I decided I should write the classes down because they were important. As I began writing down the first class I suddenly realized I was late for class. Reluctant to leave the list behind I went to the class and walked in as the professor was beginning to teach. The class was The History of Western Civilization and I had taken it before.

Interpretation

These dreams indicate to me that I am going through some remedial work to prepare me for the next kundalini event. Perhaps I am needing a “review” of lessons previously learned. Considering the resistance I encountered during the most recent kundalni event, I suspect I am being allowed to prepare myself for the upcoming changes. Plus, I am in a period of transition and being it was my heart that was activated this last time the transition may be a bit bumpy.

The phone in the dream indicates communication is coming into play as well. Perhaps I am learning how to communicate my feelings? I have been struggling with communicating emotionally charged topics. Plus, I have a meeting at work on Monday with my supervisor for reasons unknown. Unknown meetings with a supervisor always stress me out and I worry about what I have done wrong. I have had many instances in the past where I have cried in front of supervisors, unable to control my emotion. It makes me feel stupid and weak and I hope that I do not have such an incident again.

Advertisements

Kundalini Patterns

The benefit of documenting kundalini experiences is that I am starting to see patterns. My last kundalini awakening was not documented so thoroughly and there are huge gaps and missing experiences that made it hard to detect any patterns. I now wish I had been more thorough but then again I did not even know it was kundalini until much later in the game.

Timeline

September 13 – dream about resuming class

September 28 – root chakra activation

October 8 – dream message about four levels

October 14 – dream about pulling teeth

October 21 – message that I have a “time keeper” and healing dreams

October 30 – November 2 – lightening bolt kundalini activity for a week

November 20 – healing experience with guides (Bulletholes post)

November 26 – dream of being at a university to attend school

December 1 – dream of taking a test

December 2 – preparation message giving date of 12/12/14

December 3 – 7th and 8th chakra kundalini activation

December 7 – test preparation dream

December 12 – major kundalini event

December 19 – message that chakras are being aligned

January 15 – dream about graduating

January 18 – guide message that chakras are being reset

February 1 – guide message of being attuned

February 9 – trapped energy symptom of kundalini

February 15 – OBE of teaching

February 23 – major kundalini event

February 25 – tooth alignment dream

February 26 – test dream where I was told not to take the test yet

February 28 – dream of failing a test and going to university

Pattern

The pattern I am seeing is pretty obvious.

Stage 1: There is a dream or a message from my guides indicating that something is about to occur. The most common for me are dreams involving tests and teeth.

Stage 2. Kundalini events come within days or weeks of the dreams. There are often small, specifically targeted kundalini events prior to a big kundalini event.

Stage 3: Period of transition that involves “attunement” and “alignment” following major kundalini event. Symptoms occur based upon chakras affected. Mini kundalini events are establishing new pathways in the body.

It is also very obvious that kundalni is rising from my root to crown at this time although there was a jump from the root chakra to the 7th and 8th chakras immediately prior to the first major kundalini event on December 12th. Why this occurred, I am not sure but I suspect it was to open up communication channels between myself and my team of guides in addition to getting my attention.

The most recent kundalin event centered around my heart chakra. This means that the next one will be in the fifth chakra and from the symptoms and dreams I have been having this transition may already be occurring.

Future

I have had two dreams recently about tests suggesting another major kundalini event is soon to come. I did not post about these test dreams but will soon be adding them in order to document them. Since the dream I most recently had was of me failing a test it could be that the next event will not occur until that test is “passed”. This recent dream also contained symbols about communication suggesting the fifth chakra is next on the list.

I am impressed at how quickly the kundalini is progressing. In a matter of six months I have gone through four chakras.

Pounding Heart

It has been a rough couple of days.

After I sent healing the night before last I was kept awake by a sick baby who could not breathe from all the snot in his little nose. My mother-in-law came to help at midnight but then I could not settle to sleep. My heart was pounding in my chest like I was running and I felt “off”.

I went downstairs to take a Benadryl and saw three missed calls. This is at 1:30am and so I became worried about my husband who was scheduled to arrive home and should already have been home. I called back the number and it was the airport. She said, “He lost his car”. Hahaha! Within minutes he came through the door. By 2pm I tried to go back to sleep.

Again my heart was pounding and I was uncomfortably hot but my feet were ice cold! I eventually fell asleep but I suspect it was 3am by the time I did.

Skip to last night. After my normal bedtime routine I focused on my body’s energy like I usually do. After a few minutes my heart began to pound again like I was exercising. With it came an anxiousness with no source. I sat more upright and it helped but I was not getting any assistance from my guides. What the heck?

Strange vibrations shot through my chest area and behind my eyes was this strange blotchy light. It was greenish blue amidst the normal black. When I would see the color and feel the vibrations my heart would stop pounding (or maybe it was just not noticeable).

I asked for help and realized I needed to move my energy from top to down. After doing this a few times I found myself forgetting what I was doing in the midst of it. Before long I fell asleep.

Ascension Symptoms Update

  • Sleep disturbances
  • Pounding heart
  • Feeling uncomfortably hot
  • Short-term memory hiccups
  • Vibrations
  • Neck/back stiffness
  • Sensitivity to others energy
  • Heightened psychic/mediumship ability
  • Sweating
  • Ringing in ears
  • Pressure in head/popping in ears
  • Muscle spasms

The most noticeable and uncomfortable issues are the pounding heart, sensitivity to others energy along and heightened psychic/mediumship ability. I am pretty sure the heart pounding is a direct result of energy being trapped in my heart chakra because when I manipulated my own energy it stopped. I also know that the chakra clearing now is my heart chakra. The heightened sensitivity to others and increase in my psychic/mediumship is controllable and has not since been an issue. Thankfully, I am very good at blocking.

Energy Funk

I’m not in a funk but it is obviously happening to many others. Wow!

Today I had my physical. At the doctor’s office I was positive and quite cheerful as I talked to the receptionist and gave her my cards. I plopped one down without incident but the other one fell sideways and spun toward her. She then looked at me with such an evil, hatred-filled looked that I was taken aback. The energy that she threw at me was just as bad. My stomach actually did a flip-flop from it! I looked at her, smiled and told her, “I promise I didn’t do that on purpose. I was just dropping it down like the other one and it did not go right”. She just stared me down.

I sat down and actually considered leaving the place. The negativity was very heavy and I felt almost overcome by it. I watched her do her thing behind the window, observing her body, her posture, her aura. She was really filled with ick!

She turned around and opened the window and gave me back my IDs. I almost told her, “Would it make you feel better if you threw them at me?” But I didn’t say anything. She might have done it as I felt she wanted to!

I eventually sat on the other end of the waiting room to get away from her energy. It took me a while to get thoughts of telling the doctor about her. I eventually let it go completely. The poor woman obviously was struggling and I meant her no ill.

Turns out the doctor was pretty low on energy, too. She was pregnant and pleasant but low, like she could turn on a dime. I was happy to get out of there.

When I got back to work I had an emergency situation that was very negative. Later, at a work event, I picked up on the thoughts and energy of some women who didn’t know me. I  introduced myself, explaining my schedule kept them from meeting me at other events, but I could feel the heavy energy from them. Later, I could feel the probing thoughts of one woman. She was wondering about me, questioning my presence there. I ignored them the best I could.

I am not a mind-reader but today I swear I heard actual thoughts/sentences with the negative energy. It was really uncomfortable for me but I handled it well. I have to be careful not to blurt out a response.

How to Respond

I understand my response was not ideal. I actually took in some of the receptionist’s energy for a bit until I realized it and discarded it. What I should have done was send her love and positive energy, even distance healing. At the time, though, I was caught off guard. I should have known better since I noticed the energy of the entire space was “off”.

I handled the second encounter better. I was pleasant and ignored the energy and protected my own energy without thinking about it. I long ago learned to put a bubble around myself to protect myself from negativity. However, hearing others thoughts (if that is really what I did) is new to me and I will have to double up on my protection and keep my Ego in check in order to not be affected. Finally, I got away from the energy, which is one of the suggestions I make in my series of posts Easing the Symptoms of Ascension.

It is obvious to me from today that some people are really struggling right now. I am going to send out prayers and healing to them tonight. Please join me if you have the time. I will be doing it around 10pm CST.

Tooth Alignment

I slept deeply again last night. I am hoping this pattern continues as I am needing this break from OBEs, kundalini, and guide communication. It can get to be a little too much (never thought I would say that!).

My dreams are few and far between. Last night I had two I recall.

School Video

In this dream I returned to the old, 1920s era gym that was at my middle school growing up. There was a crowd there who were my classmates grown up. I was watching a video a classmate was showing the group. In it I saw myself from around 5th grade and it was clear as day. I remarked, “Mine (video) is blurry”.

The group was then playing volleyball together in the gym but I stayed on the sidelines saying, “I am not good at team sports”. The ball went into the gym once and I would not go in. I said, “You know it is haunted?”

As I was leaving a woman was freaking out in the parking lot. I saw her run away from a woman with short, gray-blonde hair who looked shocked. I instinctively knew the older woman had told the other woman something disturbing. I told the older woman, “You can’t just go up and tell people what you know/hear from Spirit. Some people can’t handle it.”

Tooth Alignment

This dream was strange in that I was at a dentist’s office but was not getting a procedure. Instead my teeth and mouth were being inspected by two dentists. One I never saw but knew was the primary one and the other was dark haired and the secondary dentist or partner. They were talking to me about aligning my teeth and I told them I didn’t want it done. I was pleasant about it and not concerned and neither were they. They inspected my teeth and told me about the procedure and how it was painless. I recall seeing in my mind the teeth being gently moved, like braces would do.

The dark haired doctor brought in a woman and her mother. I said, “Oh so since I am so easy you are going to work on someone else while I’m here?” I got the feeling they did not want to waste time but now I think they wanted me to see the procedure done on a willing patient.

The woman was my age and looked like she was from India – honey brown hair and skin almost the exact color of her hair. Her face was flawless and I remember looking really closely at her and hearing how she had the procedure done often. She was relaxed and her eyes closed, though she did take a peek at me.

When I was ready to leave the second dentist was asking me about my next appointment. He said he would be my doctor and said it would be $80. I said, “Well do you take insurance?” He indicated he did not and I said, “Well then I probably won’t come”. He appeared disappointed.

Interpretation

I awoke one time to my entire body shaking/vibrating but did not think much of it. I suspect I was OOB with my guides during these dreams, so that makes sense. The first dream is likely me discussing my past. Since the gym is haunted it could be there are some issues still related to school to work through.

The second dream is more interesting to me. I believe I was discussing whatever my next step is with my guides. Some kind of “alignment”. I am being stubborn about it and refusing and they are trying to convince me to do it. I am introduced to a different “doctor” as well. I was not distressed about it and my overall feeling is I just need a break right now so am waiting.

Corpse in a Courtroom

I am still recovering from yesterday and the night before. The energy wave has subsided but I am still processing it. I am also doing quite a bit of work in my sleep. Last night I slept like a rock and the few dreams I recall were eye opening.

Corpse in a Courtroom

I was watching men walking around in a courtroom discussing a woman’s death. Her naked body was laid across the defendant’s table. Her skin was pale and there were large blotches of red where her blood had settled. I watched as a man turned her head and allowed it to fall over to the side. I was intent on seeing her face and saw she was blonde and pretty. I now wonder, was she me? Then, to my surprise, she moved. Was she still alive?

They discussed the girl’s diary and the image shifted. I was then in front of a book, her diary, turning page after page. I saw her life, written out. Her despair and her joy. I stopped on a page where she wrote about the birth of her daughter. There were hearts pasted in it and a picture. I saw in my mind a vibrant, brown haired girl and felt the joy the woman felt. I felt sad for her, though, because the moment was so fleeting. I thought, “If only we could freeze those moments and enjoy them more fully”. With it came an understanding that those moments are the ones we live for.

I then saw page after page of music written out and knew she had fallen in love with music and had tried to write her own. It was a dream that was soon forgotten. This also saddened me as I saw the hopes of her youth crumble in those pages.

The final page I turned opened up into a suitcase and there were a pair of Justin boots. I immediately thought of my ex and knew they were his boots. I then knew he was dead and began discussing what to do with his boots. I knew the size – 11 and someone asked if I was sure it wasn’t a 10 and I said, “No, the smallest size he wore was a 10.5”. I then sorted through other shoes – western boots and tennis shoes.

I awoke regretting my time with my ex and how I did not enjoy those moments. I recognized how caught up I was in my own drama. I built walls around myself and soon found myself trapped in my life. My guide was there assisting me. “You loved him” and “How did you feel?” I recognized that I had felt similarly at other times in my life. He asked, “Why?” and I knew it was because I had not followed my heart. I also immediately said, “I don’t want to do that again (referring to living in Alaska)”. I felt that for some reason I may have to do it again in another life. I think my lesson was not learned. I knew that I had needed to confront the feelings I had rather than run from them. I am doing that now, in my current relationship/life, but I did not with my ex. Perhaps it is an exchange we were working on and it will need to be visited again in another life?

I knew then that the corpse had been me becauseI have often referred to that time as “My other life” because it seems like it happened to someone else. I also knew there was a judgement going on and I was the defendant and the victim.

Elohim

Since last night’s kundalini experience I have been feeling odd. The last time I had a jolt of energy like that I spent the entire next day completely unable to get a grip on my thoughts and feeling energetically chaotic to the point that I had to get outside and out of the house all day. I am not experiencing that this time, thankfully, but the entire day I’ve had a pulling feeling in my heart that is not bad but is scaring me. With the feeling comes a message that says things are about to vamp up and I need to get my head out of my (you know) and stop hiding.

I have spent most of the morning trying to avoid confronting the feeling which is connected to last night’s odd resistance to the kundalini energy. But apparently I am not too good at avoiding the unavoidable.

I was suddenly unable to avoid the feeling in my heart and was overpowered by it and at the same time overcome with a wave of calming energy from my left. I heard, “Do not be afraid” from a calm, voice. But, as you might have guessed, just hearing that made me more afraid. I sent my attention in the direction of the voice, hoping for comfort and received yet another calming wave as my heart chakra seemed to triple in size inside my chest. Then I heard, “Elohim” and my stomach dropped about ten feet into the floor. I assumed I had been given a name but hearing it so clearly took me by surprise as did the accompanying feeling of fear. Why am I so afraid?

I have already laid down on the floor about four times so far in hopes of settling my energy. It has helped but as soon as I get up the overpowering sensation in my heart comes back. It is not a bad feeling, though, just scary. What I mean is that it feels exactly like how I feel before getting up in front of an audience to sing, act or present something. It is nerves, plain and simple, and I honestly hate the feeling.

I am hearing more messages but trying not to. I really am not interested in dong this. I stopped it before and I can stop it now, right? Yet what I know and hear says the opposite. The feeling says that more is coming. More experiences like last night. I am heading into new, uncharted territory (for me at least). I hear, “You are ready” and “Let us show you” and am being encouraged to listen to my heart, focus on it and enjoy the feeling rather than fear it.

I am not sure exactly who or what Elohim is. From the brief search I did online (which I promptly stopped because of intense waves of energy and heart chakra activity every time I read something familiar) it appears that Elohim is the name given to the “Gods” by the ancients. They are “the One and the Many”. It also appears that they are “alien” in origin.

I just can’t escape the alien mumbo jumbo can I? No wonder I am so resistant. I really would prefer to stay in my hidey hole please.