Meeting the Hierophant

Prior to bed last night I received a message which I am going to share with you now. The way it was received is different than in the past. The information came in pieces, sometimes broken sentences or just one or two words. The message came from a very large, bluish colored entity who I can only guess is some E.T. species. I could not see his face or his body definition. He remained mostly cloaked except for showing his coloring. He appeared hunched with long arms and seemed to be wearing a robe.

1st Message



20,000 yr orbit

Black hole diverts path of galaxy (Milkyway)

Unstable evolutionary conditions

Planet X

I fell asleep after this. Surprised I didn’t have cataclysmic dreams. lol

2nd Message

After I woke from having a very busy morning of astral projection, half of which was guide-led, I received some more information from this cloaked individual. This time, I made sure to ask him, “Who are you?” His response? Hierophant. At first I confused his name with “elephant” but I knew I had just misidentified what he had said. I was instructed to look it up and found it. When I Googled the word, I looked up Heliofant which is what I felt guided to search for. It was only after finding this article that I made the correct connection. However, I don’t believe Heliofant was a coincidence and if you read the article you might understand why. I will add that I received a message long ago (2014ish) in an OBE once that was repeated in later OBEs. The message was, “The goat will bite you.” This is all just a bit crazy to me. lol

Okay, so to the message.

I heard very clearly, “Within a moment you will be changed. Do you understand?”

Of course I said, “Yes.” But no, I don’t understand. Any of it. lol

Then I heard, “Follow the 8 winds.”

Yeah, I have no idea but then apparently there is such a thing. Ha!  Look here.

The final thing I heard was, “Four moons.” When I researched this there is a prophecy about four blood moons signaling the apocalypse.

Then there is the message in the name Hierophant.

The Hierophant is known as the High Priest in some decks. He is the masculine counterpart to the High Priestess. He is also known as Chiron, the Pope and the Shaman.

All I can say is holy *^%@ my guides laid it on thick last night. Geez! When it rains it pours.


Public Again

Hello everyone. This blog is public again. I will be editing it and perusing it for my own remembering. I do not plan to change the layout but will be editing the categories and making some of the posts private. I have a long way to go, but just giving you all a heads up on that in case you see a post one day and it is gone the next.

Since I have entered into a new phase of my spiritual journey, I am not sure at this time whether I will continue to use this blog. My experiences are so varied, so complex and difficult to categorize, that I am struggling to determine the best way to share them with others. I want my experiences to be available and easily referenced.

If you are new to this blog and have yet to look around, I suggest you start at the beginning, 2014, and work your way up to the present. The majority of the material you will find here is in the form of astral travel/OBE, dreams/dream interpretation, and other mystical experiences. Many of my OBEs and lucid dreams are spirit guided as are my mystical experiences. I meet up with my guides frequently in the in-between (trance ie. the boundary between sleep and wakefulness), thus the name of the blog. 🙂

If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to post them as a comment or shoot me an email. The contact form is located in the menu, upper left side of the blog.  If you have suggestions on how to organize my older posts, I’m all ears. 🙂




8 Months

I overslept this morning and my daughter almost missed the bus. When I woke up I heard the bus beeping which means the driver was waiting for her. My husband had been awake and never woke her up or prepared her. She flew out of bed and onto the bus unprepared. I made him take her what she forgot but I really wish I could rely on my husband for something so simple. I needed the extra sleep!

My tiredness is just increasing. I suppose the major geomagnetic storm a couple of days ago is the culprit. During the day the constant message/knowingness I am getting is to focus on life and get my shit together. For what? I have no clue, but apparently I need to do some things.

There was a message not long ago about integrating. It came to me quite suddenly and makes sense. The living between two worlds sensation that I have been experiencing since 2003 has long become my normal but I have always felt a distinct difference between the two worlds I have lived in. Now it seems that that distinction is fading. The two worlds seem more and more blended. My waking life is an active integration of the two. No longer are my spiritual experiences distinctly separate from my mundane experiences. The two are becoming one and the same.

There is a part of me that desires for the separation to remain. There is a sadness that this time is coming to an end. Yet I know that this integration of the two worlds within me is meant to be an example for others because eventually this will be everyone’s experience.

I hate to tell you this (those who are just beginning this journey or those who have not yet taken that first step) but the integration, the embodiment, is not looking to be some grand enlightenment or explosion of knowingness. From the way I am seeing it now, it just seems normal. Yes, I have had some grand experiences, some intense moments of knowingness, some enlightened periods where I feel the Oneness and vastness that is Me/We. But like all things experienced multiple times from within this human form, I have become normalized to the experience. It just IS.

I’m not saying all the work has not been worth it. Nor am I saying that I am done. We are never truly “done” anyway. What I am saying is that life keeps on and so do we regardless of the spiritual experiences and advances we have made. Life in itself IS a spiritual experience within the limits of the physical.

That vision I had of myself in 2003, of walking between worlds – on one side the physical/mundane/3D reality and on the other side life in Spirit/4D/5d and beyond – those two worlds are merging. Within US. Every day my life reveals to me how those two worlds are being experienced as One and the same. It can be amazingly beautiful but at the same time very intensely harsh and eye-opening. The days of retreating into my spiritual haven are gone. My haven is everywhere and in everything now. My spiritual experiences are now mixed into my waking life and my waking life is now mixed into the spiritual.

My mind is undergoing a major change in and of itself. This is where the blending of the two worlds is most noticeable. I have memories surface in my waking hours that are not from this timeline. This is now normal to me and I just let it flow. For example, I had a memory of a woman that I met and knew to avoid her, yet I had never met her in this timeline and as soon as I realized that, the memory of her vanished and could not be contacted. I will also catch myself having conversations throughout my day about things unrelated to my current life but very obviously related to another life in some other timeline. Sometimes they are conversations with my guides and other times they are full interactions with individuals not related to my guidance. This is my experience of the merging of the two worlds. This will also be everyone’s experience in some shape or form eventually.

Incidences such as these will just increase. Thankfully I am not confused by them as I have learned to navigate my mind and these timelines as if they are in this one. It does intrigue me when I become suddenly aware of these different lives/timelines and I use to try to seek out more information. I have learned this is pointless as my focus needs to be here, in this moment. Besides, I can choose to put my attention wherever I want whenever I want.

The challenge for me is to change my way of thinking of these two worlds. Well right there – TWO – hahaha! That is false in itself and I need to change my thinking right there. In considering the two as separate I constantly desire to be on the other side. This side I relate to as the world of Spirit, the Divine, the inexpiable, the limitless, the infinite and eternal. This side I relate to all that I feel I am not or am not able to be/achieve within this reality. My heart knows this separateness is false. My mind still needs to adjust. Majorly. lol

So now I understand what is to occur in the next 8 months. My mind needs to catch up to my heart. The integration period needs extending. My poor mind is still stuck in duality. Even as my experiences show me daily that this is false, my mind habitually shifts into rationalizing every experiences to match the reality it wishes to create. The movie screens of the mind and the heart need to be synced. The two must project the same image.


The Rainbow

Last night, quite suddenly, I recognized a symbol that had been presented to me for the last 24 hours multiple times. Sometimes I am quite dense, especially now.

The Rainbow

The first time the rainbow came to me was when I published the last post on this blog. I was searching for pictures and in my mind I saw a brilliant rainbow connecting Earth to the Heavens. It seemed like a bridge so I of course thought of the Rainbow Bridge. Since my first thought was this was related to pets and not me, I chose a different picture and moved on with my day.

I had to visit the orthodontist to fix an issue that had come up with my braces. I have a slight overbite and they had to place bite turbos in the back but they had worn down and so had to be replaced. They put a new kind of turbo behind the front of my teeth. I now look like I have tiny vampire fangs behind my front teeth. lol These turbos cause me to talk with a slight lisp. They gave me a sheet to read over and over to help me to correct the lisp. The sheet was called “Rainbow Passage”. I read through it once without making a connection.

Finally, as I was trying to sleep last night, I entered into a strange kind of semi-delirium. I would seem to fall into a semi-trance type state briefly. This would border on sleep but I never would actually fall to sleep. Then I would recollect things that had happened but seemed to have no time frame attached. I also had dizzy spells with this – like my entire world would be spinning. Since I have never passed out but have come close I can only guess that what happened to me last night was that I passed out/fainted several times only to return disoriented. It is hard now to recollect everything that occurred during this time but one memory that I returned with was being instructed to immerse myself in the rainbow, allowing each color to permeate my Being. It was when this memory surfaced that I connected the other rainbow messages and understood.

There was so much knowingness when I would surface from these episodes of unconsciousness that I remember wanting to get out of bed and write it all down. Yet my guidance encouraged me to return to sleep and with their encouragement I lost all interest in remembering and fell asleep. It was a very strange incident and I’m not sure what to make of it.

Rainbow Symbolism

Rainbows have long been associated with following one’s heart and purpose. To make it to the end of the rainbow is celebrating as a great accomplishment. There is also the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow representing one’s dreams come true. Unfortunately, the pot of gold is often never found which can represent one’s endless search for something that will never be.

My vision of the rainbow bridge, however, suggests a connecting of my Earthly Self with my spiritual Self. To me this indicates balance and receptivity. This article explains the many meanings of the rainbow and the messages it brings.

It is especially interesting to me that the rainbow can represent ascension. I received a message on Wednesday. The message was, “You will be married in two days”. I understood this to mean a spiritual marriage. Since today will mark the second day, I suppose I will see if this “marriage”comes to pass.


From the minute I woke up this morning until just a few moments ago, reminders of the waterfall in my most recent dream have been everywhere.

When I went down for breakfast this morning, this was on the counter:


Drawing of Angel Falls by my daughter, Adrian.

I had not seen the drawing before this morning, but I knew immediately what it was and my dream came straight into my mind.

Shrugging it off, I went about my day only to see an article in my news feed with this picture attached:


So now I am taking notice. What did I miss about the waterfall in my dream? Obviously I missed something or else I wouldn’t be seeing waterfalls first thing in the morning!

So I looked up the dream interpretation of waterfall:

To see a waterfall in your dream is symbolic of letting go. You are releasing all those pent up emotions and negative feelings. Alternatively, the dream represents your goals and desires. In particular, if the waterfall is clear, then it represents revitalization, regeneration and renewal. Source:

Ok. Got it. Great. Can I move on with my day now?

Well, my day has royally sucked. I don’t know if it because I didn’t get much sleep or if it something in the air (energy) today, but I have been very, very down on myself all day. I held back the emotion of it most of the day but eventually it hit me full force and all I could do was allow it to flow. I absolutely hate the feelings that came up and have not been too easy a charge for my guides today I am sure.

Then I get a message from a friend about my waterfall dream and how beautiful it was. Though I am pleased to get the message, there is the waterfall coming up again!

I put it out of my mind. Again. My frame of mind at this point is, “Whatever. Go away (guides).”

Then I am in tears because everything in my life doesn’t fit and I don’t know what to do about all that has happened to me since December. There is an awful feeling that I will feel like this for the rest of my life. That nothing is ever going to get better.

Then memories of last night come up. My husband and I were suppose to go to a concert but he got the address wrong and by the time he figured it out we would have been over an hour late for it. So we gave the tickets to friends and went out to eat. The topic (he brought it up) was divorce. Not ours but his best friend from high school was getting divorced after 16 years of marriage. My husband went on to tell me all the similarities between us and them. What is weird is that he rarely talks to this friend, had reached out to him months ago and just now received a call and this was the news he was given. Things were really feeling surreal and I felt uneasy for some reason. So I ordered a 20 ounce margarita. lol

As the evening went on, the subject shifted and my husband was asking me about a particular person. Well alcohol makes me very happy. I’m a happy drunk (well I was buzzed anyway). lol So when we talked about this person I smiled so big and could not help it. I could feel myself come alive and though I tried to stop it and hide it, it was too late. My husband saw it and said, “See! Look how you light up!” Oops! And I kept smiling after and laughing, making excuses for myself and eventually it all blew over. I think I smiled for the next three hours straight, though.

And the contrast between that happy high and this miserable low I now found myself in was just too much. I told my guides that I couldn’t take it anymore. Then life interrupted and I sucked it all up and moved on. You gotta do what you gotta do, right?

Later, I sat down to reply to an email. As I finished up the reply I looked to my left and saw the words, “Let It Go.” Hahaha! Those words were written on a piece of music sitting on top of my husband’s keyboard. From the movie Frozen. You may have heard of it….:)

Now I am still obviously dense because even though I have the messages, I am wondering, “Let go of what?” And as I type this I am reminded of a moment today when I was feeling so, so much and every feeling was conflicting with another feeling and I was thinking, “I shouldn’t be feeling this” and “What is wrong with me” and so on and so forth. I remember being told amidst my upset, “What is wrong with feeling what you feel?” With this came the idea to pay attention to those very feelings.

Ha! Me, pay attention to my feelings? hahahaha

And now I am thinking that maybe I have been letting go all along, just letting go of the wrong thing. Maybe. But then I still doubt. I have no clue. I’m hopeless.

Lucid Dream, Energy Zaps and Flying Sphere

Can you feel the energy surge? There has been a geomagnetic storm  raging since yesterday.

I noticed it yesterday. My energy was much higher than normal and my third-eye began to buzz in the evening. Then throughout the night and into the morning I had some interesting energy sensations. The energy helmet greeted me upon waking along with a nice heart chakra and solar plexus warmth.

Energy Zaps

Throughout the night I kept waking to some strange energy sensations. I have felt them before, but they still surprised me. These particular ones were connected to my thoughts. As I would drift to sleep, my mind would wander. This is a normal part of falling asleep. Everyone does it. Yet this time if a thought focused on the future, such as worrying about something that should have been or needs to be done, I would get this strange energy zap that would come in via the back of my chest and scatter as if sending shockwaves through my entire nervous system. It was very uncomfortable and woke me up every time.

After a few wakings, my guidance came through and asked, “What were you thinking about?” and I realized that only those thoughts that were anxiety-ridden were resulting in this uncomfortable energy. The solution was to focus on my heart and do some pranayama breathing. Despite doing these two things, I would still be shocked into waking because my mind would end up doing what it habitually does. The thought that woke me up the last time was: Oh, I should have made Adrian (my daughter) do her homework before bed. LOL

Lucid Dream: Back at Work

I awoke at 4am because my son was screaming. Afterward it was hard to fall back to sleep. There was energy pouring into my third-eye and crown chakras at this time forming what I like to call an energy helmet. It had been so long since I felt any energy sensations that this made falling asleep that much harder.

The next thing I remember is being in my old office at my last job. I had just arrived to work and was getting ready for the day. As I looked over my schedule and prepared for my first appointment I began thinking, “I don’t want to be here. I don’t like this job” and other similar thoughts. There was a feeling of drudgery and exhaustion that came with it. It made me feel heavy and tired.

The whole time I was sure I was wide awake but the fact that I was in my old office and back at work really upset me. I looked around at everything, inspecting it to try and find out if it was real or a dream. The acute feeling of disappointment was overwhelming and I almost started to cry. I really didn’t want to be there. Yet it felt so real!

I began to say out loud, “I don’t want to be here. I don’t work here anymore. I left this job. This has to be a dream!”

The last statement resulted in a dissolution of the entire scene. It was like it melted away around me. Very strange to witness and even stranger to feel.

The strangeness brought me back into my body but the energy sensations were not the normal vibrations I feel upon re-entry. The only way to describe them is pulsing out from me and then back into me. It was like expansion followed by contraction.

I didn’t know how to respond to this new energy so I did not attempt to go OOB, which is what I normally would have done. Instead I woke up and memories of the night flooded my mind and the energy helmet covered my head and third-eye.

Busy Night

My memories were of being with a group of four others. I seem to be with this group often – two men and two women. I have only a vague recollection of what they look like. I know one man has very dark hair but when I try to focus on any of them I only see a blur. Last night we met like we have been for some time. We usually gather together in a circle, holding hands. I have memory of doing this but am not sure what we are doing exactly.

What I recall of last night is flying in some kind of hover craft. In the dream there was a superhero theme going on and the vehicle resembled the bat mobile except that it was much, much smaller and had no tires. I was invited to fly it and was reluctant at first but then accepted the invitation. I went from apprehensive to full out thrilled as I flew it faster and faster. It was quite fun!

Another memory I have is of interacting with this hovering sphere with two dark “eyes”. It resembled some kind of video surveillance drone. It was black and dark gray and zoomed around me about four feet above my head. It was about the size of a basketball. In the dream I had been told I won a prize and was given laser guns and played a game of trying to zap the drone with the lasers. lol

What is funny is that I recall that I woke from this dream to a feeling of being zapped by energy and hearing the electrified buzzing sound that I heard yesterday while in a lucid state. The sound was so very unsettling yet at the same time completely familiar. I had been too tired at the time to notice but when the memory returned so did the memory of the distinct sound. Crackling, electrified buzzing. Reminds me of the sound a lite saber makes. lol

Heart Chakra and Solar Plexus Warmth

I settled down to meditate because I knew sleep was unlikely. My thoughts drifted to the power of heart connections and mulling over how the world would be in the future. How would humans deal the intensity of heart connections? How are we suppose to handle them?

The answer eluded me, likely because I still have so many ingrained beliefs that need to be released. I thought about my own experience and how it has affected me. I cannot imagine a society where everyone feels such a connection. .

The entire time my thoughts were on this subject my heart chakra was lit up with a warm, inviting energy. My solar plexus soon joined the heart. All along my third-eye was blazing. Just feeling the wonderful heart warmth was a relief. I really thought I wouldn’t feel it again. I want it to stay forever.



How I Cope and Other Random Things

This break or amplification or whatever you want to call it is not bothering me anymore. I’m over it. In fact, I’ve been feeling rather normal and like my old self except that I’m most definitely not my old self.

I had a friend ask me the other day, “How do you cope in the midst of extreme difficulty?” My reply was something funny and not really true and I’ve been thinking about her question ever since she asked it.

What I’ve been doing to cope this week is exercising. Actually, I’ve been doing it all through this “cave period”. It started out with me just going outside and finding things to do in our yard. I turned part of our back yard into a garden one day just for the hell of it. And for several days in a row I raked the front yard of the Live Oak leaves that fell in March. This week I’ve been doing cardio routines off YouTube. Today’s really kicked my butt.

If I’m not exercising then I’m doing yoga or cleaning house or, my favorite, baking and cooking. Yum!  I made quiche on a whim yesterday and homemade bread just a couple of days before that. I’ve even got an entire week’s worth of meals planned (unlike me really).

When my mind goes into overdrive I usually get moving. The harder I work my body, the less I am in my mind. In fact, I get so focused on my physical body that I literally go out of my mind (not in the crazy way). Then for the remainder of the day my energy surges until it plateaus around bedtime. I call it moving meditation and it is my absolute favorite kind of meditation. Yeah, I know, I’m nuts. lol

So basically, I guess I should have told my friend, “When things get tough, then I get moving.”

Now that is not always true. Sometimes I turn into sloth woman. That is rare, though. Usually, despite being sloth-like, I still make myself move and then the heaviness peels off little by little and my energy returns. And at times I’ve gotten out the wine. But again, this is very, very rare.

Exercise really is a cure-all. Even for ascension.

Oh and I’ve cried while working out. Yep. lol Not because the workout is hard, either, but the healing/cleansing kind of crying. 🙂


Shifting gears a little here…..(yeah I’m in that kind of mood). Here is a picture I took with my son today. He was being squirmy and trying to take the camera instead of sitting still.


If you look closely, you will see my braces (barely – they’re ceramic). I am already very pleased with the results and I’ve only had them a week. Normally, with this kind of picture, I would have deleted it because one tooth would have poked out and looked ugly. Now that tooth is non-existent. How that is even possible in a little over 1 week, I don’t know, but I’m happy about it. 🙂

The List

Shifting gears again… My husband has me researching where we will move. I refuse to move to states with state income tax, so that leaves very, very few places for us to relocate to. Here are our choices:

Florida 🙂
South Dakota
New Hampshire

My choices, with the first being my top pick and the last being never, ever will it happen:

New Hampshire
South Dakota

I don’t know exactly where he stands on this but I do know he is very keen on Wyoming and any place with snow (ugh). He also said he likes Wyoming because it’s one of the least populated states. Honestly, I did not tell him no on Wyoming, but really I can’t imagine living there after living in Montana and Alaska for as long as I did. I’m all snowed out. Plus, I’ve done the hermit thing long enough. So, I suggested we just move to East Texas. He’s dead set against it and my daughter started crying (dramatic). She has her heart set on Florida and the beach. lol I told her Texas has beaches but that didn’t help.

My husband is getting very antsy about the move. He told me yesterday, “Hurry up and pick somewhere because we have to be out in a month.” Huh? I told him, “Um. No. We have to wait until school’s out.”  And no matter how often I tell him Florida, he keeps asking me, “Where are we moving?” Sigh. Geminis!