CrAzY energy right now! Whew! I’m actually flying high now compared to before. Feeling almost 100% now and grateful for it.
I didn’t wake up feeling too grand, though. Had some doubt creeping in because of something that happened last night.
Tuesday I was invited to a FB group called “Be Your Own Twin Flame” by a member of the walk-in group I’m a part of. I didn’t know her but agreed because the title seemed like a group I might be interested in. I browsed it and noticed there wasn’t too much interaction. Pretty much all the posts were by the woman who invited me to the group. She later sent me an email encouraging me to post a little about myself. So I thought, “Why not?” I posted a link to my blog and introduced myself and let it be.
Then last night she sent me a message. I am not going to cut and paste it because I do not want to subject you to the energy behind it. To summarize, she told me that she deleted my post from her group because she felt I was still in 3D, full of Ego, and in separation from All. She said she wants her group to have only 5D communication and any communication that is not of 5D and part of the One would be removed. Then she invited me to post again but only from my heart and Oneness.
When I received the email the energy felt really weird, so much so that it felt to blast me with a strange metallic surge that left me with a metallic taste in my mouth. My first inclination was to stop reading it immediately but I kept on and stupidly subjected myself to the energy.
I felt myself react defensively at first. Mostly, I wanted to completely withdraw from the online world and go into hiding again, which is odd. Thankfully there was a softness from within that soothed me and asked me to “stand down”. It did not take me long to realize I had been triggered, but why?
Later, after contemplating the feelings I was having, it occurred to me that the reasoning of the message was all wrong. 5D is not about rejecting 3D altogether. It is not about separation from other humans or humanity. This woman was using 5D as a justification to set herself apart from others. To perpetuate the “Us” versus “Them” syndrome humans so frequently fall victim to. She insinuated that Ego was not allowed. It was to be eliminated altogether and any indication of its existence in a post meant the person was still in 3D and not yet elevated to the 5D level.
But then there was the metallic feeling and taste in the energy that hit me when I first read her message. What was that all about? I remember thinking right after the experience, “If this is what 5D is all about, I want no part of it.” lol
I felt so disturbed I actually blocked her. I have never blocked anyone in my life but I felt so dirtied, so contaminated by her energy that I wanted to ensure she never messaged me again.
I am also concerned for all the others who are following this woman.
When I went to sleep I asked for clarity on the situation. Was I just reacting to her email because she made me feel wrong? Was it all an Ego reaction? Or is there something I am missing?
When I awoke I felt no clearer than when I went to bed. My dreams didn’t seem to point to an answer and again I was doubtful and questioning everything. Maybe I should withdraw from the online social media world? I felt rejected. I hate that feeling and my tendency is to withdraw from the source of the rejection.
My guidance asked me, “Remember to focus on that which makes you feel good, not on what doesn’t.” I remembered and immediately shifted to doing just that. I enjoy connecting with others. I love the spiritual. Writing in my blog is one of the highlights of my day. I enjoy all of it, so why stop just because of one rotten apple?
My day just got better after that.
Random Luck or Message?
Around lunchtime I decided to go for a short run-walk. I am still recovering from my illnesses so a full run is not a good idea. Even a run-walk is challenging lately.
Around a half mile into my run I began to notice my thought patterns. What I was thinking about use to cause me upset in the past but now I have gotten so use to it that I hardly even notice despite these thoughts occurring daily, multiple times a day. Yet I noticed this time. With this noticing I realized I was in full acceptance, no longer rejecting or resisting this new reality. Smiling I looked up and saw something laying on the road:
They were laying in the road just like in this picture. When I saw them I stopped and thought, “That can’t be what I think it is.” When I got closer and I realized it was two $100 bills I picked them up and stashed them in my leggings and continued on my way. I did check to see if anyone was around but there was no one. Not even a parked car around.
I was in shock for about another half mile. A strange surreal feeling fell over me. Was I dreaming? Did it even happen? Reality check time!
Eventually I convinced myself it hadn’t happened and the money had to be fake. Never would I be so lucky. The most money I’ve ever found was $10 that flew into my car on a windy day.
So I stopped and checked my leggings. Yep. Two $100 bills. Security strip and everything. No doubt about it. lol I kept the money in my hand from that moment on, though, because my leggings didn’t have pockets and I didn’t want it falling out through my pant leg. lol I also think I did this so that it stayed real to me. The whole thing really shifted my reality. BIG TIME.
Then I felt guilty. Maybe someone is looking for their lost money? I should turn back and check. So I ran around the block and went back to where I thought I had found the money. Unfortunately, I couldn’t remember exactly where I was when I found it and since there were no new cars parked or people around looking I kept running. What was I going to do? Knock on all the houses asking if they lost money? I found it in the road, so not by a particular house and there weren’t any cars around either.
Not long after opting to just keep the money I noticed something on the ground. I swear it said, “Blondes break rules.” I thought to myself, “That did NOT say what I think it said.” I laughed aloud to myself and turned around to check. This is what it was:
I picked it up and took it with me just because and laughed for another half mile.
I kept run-walking for another mile and then ended off. My heart rate was higher than normal and I was feeling anxious for no reason. Not anxious because I did something wrong, though. Anxious because I felt different somehow.
I knew I needed to eat and settle down. I also could not help but think that the money and the Starbucks trash was more than just a message that I was breaking some unwritten rule by keeping the money. In fact, I knew that wasn’t the message. What was the message then?
As I cooled down I mulled over the events of my run specifically focusing on my thoughts prior to finding the money. I recalled that I had felt an urge to look up and pay attention, but what was I thinking about immediately before that? When I realized I was thinking about everything that transpired from December, 2015 to present – this entire crazy personal spiritual transformation I have been going through – I understood the real message.
The $100 bills were both on the road but separated by about a foot. I kept thinking, “OMG I found $200”, but really I found 2, $100 bills. In numerology you add the digits of a number to get it down to one number. So you can get the number 2 two ways, one of them is by adding 1+1. I could see the $100 bills then as representing the two 1’s of an 11. 11’s have been following me around since 2015 and continue to do so. However, what I feel the message was this time was that the two 1’s here are indicating two separate, whole individuals.
The “Blonde breaks rules” message on the trash was about me but not about keeping the money. The “rules” here represent beliefs and belief systems. I have been and am breaking through them and the end result will be – maybe already is? – Wholeness.
When I realized the message I began to feel stranger than I already was. My anxiety was increasing and I had to get a grip on it before I ended up in a panic attack. Then my right ear began to ring. I’ve been experiencing ear ringing a lot, though.
It took a while for the strange anxiety to subside. Then I went and laid in the warm sun on a blanket spread out on the grass for a while.
There is more to this message, much, much more but I haven’t received it all yet. The energies during and after my run hit me hard, too. It was as if I was stuck by lightening again except this time it wasn’t via the Kundalini like I am so use to.
I know I have recently gone through a major download, so major that it knocked me on my butt for two weeks straight. Illness was the main symptom – my throat and root chakras the main focus, but I have also been experiencing some crazy ear ringing and on and off exhaustion. Then there are the dreams, messages, super empathy, and clarity. All of it points to a download/upgrade, or whatever you want to call it.
There was an incident a couple of days ago where I noticed a deep humming coming from my right. It seemed off in the distance and as I focused on it, it grew louder and louder until it turned into a distinct, high pitched ringing in my right ear. I kept expecting Spirit to audibly speak to me which is unusual because I have never associated ear ringing with Spirit audibly speaking to me. But this was different. I fully expected to hear a message. Huh?
All of this and then the woman at Pet’s Mart stalking me for not watching my son (weird) and then the metallic taste from reading a message on FB, I can’t help but wonder what is going on. Is it me? Is it the world? Both?
My intuition tells me to stay on my toes – to keep looking, keep noticing, because there is more being conveyed to me via this experience than I realize.
P.S. The featured image for this post is a quote that popped up this morning when I was uploading an image from Canva. I noticed it and wrote it down because it felt important.