Dream: WOD & OBE: What Nourishes My Soul?

My middle child has been sick since Sunday. He missed the first day back to school and is home today as well. His symptoms are bad headache and low grade fever of around 100.3°. Yesterday he was well enough in the morning to go shopping with me so I thought he was recovering. Sadly, by evening he was complaining again but could not describe what was hurting him. He fell asleep around 5pm and slept until this morning waking occasionally in a delirium and talking nonsense. This morning he says he feels better. When I told him he once said he thought he was dying he said, “Yeah, I was worried I would have a headache forever.” We suspect he has the flu. 😦

His birthday is Friday. I sure hope he is fully recovered by then.

In thinking of his birthday story (I went into labor with him on 1-11-11 but he was born at just after midnight) I realized tomorrow is yet another version of 1-11-11 only instead of 1-11-2011 it will be 1-11 and then 2+0+1+8 = 11. It will be exactly 7 years from when I was in labor. Pretty cool! I wonder if anything significant is going to happen? Hmmm

BTW, the 1111 number continues to follow me as if reminding me my journey is not over.

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January 8th, pre-workout. Strapped on my watch and this was the time. 🙂

Updates and Plans

Since I have written in a while on what is going on with me I figured I would do a little update.

I completed my online NASM course on Monday. My next step is to get First Aid/CPR certified and then take the NASM certification exam. Once I pass the exam I will be a certified personal trainer and can get a job. My plan is to do an 8 week internship at a local gym first via the program I enrolled in. After completing the internship I am guaranteed a job.

My motivation regarding this new career path is on-again-off-again. Some days I think it will be a good thing and other days I just want to drop it completely. It is hard for me to see myself doing anything in the workaday world right now. It is good that I paid so much for the program because it is the money that is making me keep at it. I hate to spend money and then not at least experience the end results of my efforts. Follow through and give it a chance, right?

I am still running and lifting weights and doing my fitness thang. lol I run three days a week and lift weights three days a week, neither on the same days. I found that separating the running and lifting was better for me. My body wasn’t tolerating that routine well. Honestly, I don’t think anyone’s body would tolerate a schedule like that long! I’ve maintained my weight and body fat and will continue to maintain it until I get bored. Ha!

The heart palpitations continue. Not sure exactly why but they are a daily occurrence. When they happen I feel it in my throat, which is odd. If I take my pulse I can feel my pulse rate slow and then catch up within a few seconds. I suspect the BC might be partly to blame but I am giving the BC at least 6 months. Thus far my acne has remained under control. I stopped taking the antibiotics three weeks ago.

Speaking of antibiotics, I think they have messed with my gut flora so I am going to revisit the GAPS diet to return the balance. I won’t be going full-out with the diet but using some of the components such as the broth, probiotics, yogurt/kefir (yuck) and lots of veggies. It will mean no non-fermented dairy and gluten-free for a time but that won’t be an issue. I am also  toying with the idea of making my own yogurt. It sounds like a healthy and fun project. I haven’t started the diet just yet, need to review the book, but I am looking forward to relieving some of the side-effects of taking antibiotics for so long. Interestingly, the last time I did the GAPS diet was in January 2015 right after taking a round of antibiotics for exactly the same acne issue!

Someone asked about Monty not long ago so will update on him. He is doing well. He weighed 12.5lbs at his 14 week checkup. He is potty trained (yay!) though still has occasional accidents here and here. We recently leash trained him and he does well on a leash, already indicating he will be an excellent running partner in the future.

Dream: WOD

I was taken to a mountain town with a group of people. We walked up steep trails to a house that was in pretty bad shape. There was an interaction inside with a man who was using the house as part of his work. I soon realized my group were my coworkers and we were being introduced to a new part of our job.

After much discussion someone mentioned how the city was growing fast and asked if I wanted to work there. I was hesitant and they said, “We will pay all costs of relocating. You will have your own house and all expenses will be paid.”  Still reluctant, I looked out the window and saw miles of pig farms (overindulgence, gluttony). I said, “I don’t think so. I couldn’t live in such filth.” I somehow knew the growth of the city relied upon pig farming.

They referred to the city as WOG but for some reason I called it WOD. In the dream these names meant nothing but upon waking I knew both well. Wog is a term used in Scientology that refers to non-Scientologists. A wog is a “common, everyday garden-variety humanoid … He ‘is’ a body. [He] doesn’t know he’s there, etc. He isn’t there as a spirit at all.” WOD is a cross-fit term that means “Workout of the Day”. Both terms make sense in the context of this dream. Wog indicates that I saw the groups of people I would be working with as unawakened. The pigs and shit they wallowed in indicate the state of the unawakened in the world. WOD indicates that I saw working with wog’s as part of my job (work-of-the-day) – just an everyday thing.

Eventually I was introduced to other coworkers who had relocated to the city. They were all having a party with the locals and pizza was ordered. I remember staying with a man inside the house. He showed me how to clean up the feces (materialism, possessions, pride, aggression) that was in abundance. I think he did this to try and convince me that all hope was not lost. The visuals are pretty gross. He showed me a huge barrel full of human feces. Then showed me how to contain it. I unpacked a box and carefully kept the contents, a bunch of kitchen materials, separated from the contaminated stuff. There was a small, plastic container in the box for the feces and it was explained that once contained the amount would never be more than the size of the container.

Then I was introduced to a man with blonde hair and was told he was “our brother”. He was young, maybe 20-something, and very attractive. I looked to the man who had been teaching me, who I also knew was my brother, and said, “How is he my brother?” It was explained to me that we had the same father but I believe that is how my human mind interpreted because the explanation if very muddled in my memory. I recall looking around the room at all the others and thinking they were all my “brothers” and my family was really big.

Then I met a woman whose name was “Joy” but she was the complete opposite. I laughed and called her by her name and she got nasty with me. I knew I had made an enemy of her. I didn’t care, I was trying to lighten the mood because she was overly serious.

She stayed there with us as we prepared to go to the party outside. The weather had warmed substantially. Usually it was freezing but that day it was in the 60’s. I opted not to wear shorts even though most others were.

We went to the party and I was surprised to find that the celebration consisted of everyone driving go karts (ability to navigate life’s twists and turns) around a circular dirt track. There was a quick demo on how to use them and I was fascinated that a work party would involved something so fun. I watched as “Joy” stepped up to a go kart. Her response to me was the complete opposite of before. She greeted me like an old friend and told a woman next to me she was grateful to have met me, that I had helped her by something I told her. The woman told me and I said, “I don’t remember saying that to her.” It didn’t matter, though, Joy was now full of….joy. lol

OBE: What Nourishes My Soul?

I woke at around 6am with the dream on my mind. While going over it in my mind I must have drifted into the in-between because the next thing I recall is sitting at my computer with my children to my right. I saw the screen clearly. At first I was viewing FB. Something wasn’t quite right, though. It showed that I had no friends and I got a message that said, “Add friends”. Confused, I figured there must be a glitch with FB. I shifted to my website and noticed the format had changed. I could not see my followers and suddenly became aware that I had none.

As I looked over my website my screen went gray and a tiny message was written in the center. At first I thought I got an email from someone I hadn’t heard from in a while but turns out it was a message that someone had reblogged one of my posts.

The gray screen with the message in the center made me aware of vibrations. I could feel them and my physical body very distinctly. I could feel my heart doing weird things and the vibrations were similar to a feeling of restlessness. I knew I was dreaming and knew that the vibrations meant I could shift OOB but I was not 100% certain. I began to sway back and forth to see if I could feel the shift. It just felt like swaying, though. Still curious I opted to just leave my body and see what would happen.

So I turned to my left and stood up from my seated position. I disconnected and moved easily toward the window. On the way to the window I took off a pair of black sunglasses (not wanting to be seen, not wanting to see something, darkened vision) but my vision was not an issue. I could see clearly and vividly the window and white blinds in front of me. I unlocked the window and pulled it up. Then I went through the window to the porch roof. As I steadied myself I thought, “I don’t want to do the same thing I always do.” Then I said aloud, “I want to know what nourishes my soul.” I said this as I looked up at a brilliant night sky. In the center was a glowing full moon.

I stood there staring at the moon for a bit and thinking my intention again: “Show me what nourishes my soul.” Then I thought to myself, “Why am I asking that question?” lol And then I thought, “Now what do I do? Do I just wait for an answer?” With that thought I could feel the scene destabilize. I did not fight it because I was confused as to why I asked such a question. Where did it come from? Weird!

As I returned to my body I knew the answer: Love. I thought, “Duh! I know that!” lol

Lingering in the remaining vibrations, part of a song came to mind: “Two strangers in the [dark night] bright lights….” I messed up the lyrics and thought “dark night”. Here is the song:

Surprised that I even went OOB, I was unable to return to sleep and just lingered with the song going though my mind while I mulled over my dream. I remember thinking about nourishing my soul with love. It made me feel a bit sad and I began to feel depressed over the whole idea of living the rest of my life hungry….starving even.

In response to my growing despair at ever finding the nourishment I need, I heard, “Don’t give up.”


I had not expected to have such a revealing dream after yesterday’s decision to not fall victim to over-analyzing dream content. The dream says a lot about my path, my concerns and considerations regarding my path/life.

Meeting my “brother” and then knowing I had many, many “brothers” was interesting as well. It feels like my human self is trying to make sense of the connection I have with others. In the dream it felt like “brother” was a relative very similar to a half-brother or sister. The same “father”, which if you think about it, indicates that everyone in this world is our Spirit sibling. We all come from the same father-God-One-Source.

I am obviously struggling with the wogs – unawakened – here on Earth, and how they are caught up in materialism, over-indulgence and selfishness. It is akin to the world being covered in pig shit. LOL It is made clear to me that they (my family, the human race) wants me to “relocate” and do my job (meaning get my ass into gear doing my Earth work instead of hiding from it). My job seems to be taking the “shit”, cleaning it up and containing it. Ha!

It is dreams like this one that I wish I could remember what was actually being said rather than bringing back just symbolism. The feeling is there but it does not completely compute. There is still the question, “So I am here to help, but HOW?” Cleaning up pig shit I guess. LOL


Welcome 2018! – Multiple OBEs

So 2017 is now behind us. Hallelujah! Doing the happy dance over here. I am SO happy 2017 is over. Not that is was all terrible but it was mostly a very tough year for me. It was all about letting go, healing, peeling off more layers of illusion/false Self, and difficult inner work. If I look back at this time last year it still makes me shudder a bit. I would not wish what I went through on even my worst enemies. I hope to never experience that kind of pain again.

I had a Knowing yesterday that someone in my family will pass this year, someone not close to me but close to my mom or MIL. It was not disturbing to me but I know it will be to someone close to me – not my immediate family, though (husband and children). My grandmother has sisters who survived her and they are all getting up there in age. Similarly, my MIL has family that is pretty old. We all contemplated who it might be but didn’t linger on it. What will be, will be. As always, I don’t see death as a grievous thing but as a release; freedom from the limitations of the body and this physical existence.

A comment was left not long ago about how the first 12 days of the new year tell of the coming months. One’s dreams provide a sneak peak at what to expect. So, I have decided to record what dreams I remember over the next 12 days. Maybe I will be shown what is coming? Maybe not. We’ll see how it pans out.

Multiple OBEs

I can’t recall my dreams at all for some reason. All I remember is waking up in tears at one point. It is odd that I don’t recall why. I woke the night of the 31st in tears, too. Maybe the full moon is pulling it out of me yet again. I had hoped 2018 would mark the end of the teary dreams. Guess not.

When I woke at 5am I was wide awake and feeling disappointed and sad. I rolled over on my right side and fell into thoughts of the year ahead. It wasn’t long until I shifted OOB and into a dark room.

My energy was low and so it was difficult to remain OOB. I would shift into the dark room, roam about for a bit trying to get my bearings, and then shift back into my body temporarily. I did this approximately 5 times for varying lengths of time.

I don’t remember much except the dark, unfamiliar room which I assumed was a version of my bedroom. There was an excursion out of my room and the house but it was short-lived. As soon as I attempted to fly out the window I felt to hover as if stuck in place and then my vision blacked out completely as I shifted back into body. Then there was one instance where a black man was sitting in the middle of the room smoking a strange looking pipe. It resembled a large, perfectly cylindrical stick with a tiny mouthpiece on the end. He smoked it and then offered it to me. I politely refused and went back into body.

The final OBE was the longest and most memorable. I exited my body thinking, “I need to do something to stay longer.” Then I drifted over to the stairs and decided to jump down rather than “walk”. I hesitated feeling it was not advisable but then pushed past the consideration and jumped over. The fall down was bumpy as if my considerations paused the fall.

When I got to the bottom I headed toward the front door. Remembering I needed to do something to increase my energy I looked down at my hand. I was wearing green garden gloves so had to take them off to look at my hand. Oddly I don’t recall what my ungloved hand looked like but looking at it seemed to work.

I floated out the front door and noticed the front lawn was different. Instead of grass it was stones separated by dark mulch. When I looked up I could see the night sky but the stars were not as brilliant as they should be. I looked harder, trying to get the sky to clarify but it never did.

I floated out toward the street and immediately noticed the streets were covered in clear ice. Delighted I thought, “I can ice skate!” I went down to the street and began to try and skate only since I had astral legs it was more of a sliding motion. I tried to get my feet to work but gave up quickly and just enjoyed slipping and sliding down the street.

I skated for some time and ended up wondering where I was going. I paused and looked up at the sky again. The stars were still muted it seemed and I focused on them again to try and get them to shine more brightly without success. Then my vision blanked out but instead of it turning black and shifting back in body my vision became white and the outline of petals began to form. It was as if I was looking into the center of a white lotus or similar flower. Fascinated, I stared into the white petals and they shifted and morphed into the outline of a distant scene. The more I looked, the more the scene solidified and I realized I was being offered the opportunity to shift to a higher level of astral via some kind of portal.

Despite being given the opportunity to shift to a new scene I opted out. There was a strong sense of boredom over all of it. I can’t recall my exact thought but it was something like, “No matter where I go it won’t matter or change anything in my physical life so why bother?”

I felt myself shift back into my body and it took a bit for my energy to stabilize. I felt bored and disappointed by the experience and my thoughts were on the coming year. I felt 2018 was not going to offer me anything except more struggle and upset.


OBEs offer similar insight into one’s waking life as do dreams. In this case I was unable to maintain my energy and my vision was dark most of the time. This indicates that I am unwilling to see something as it is; so my confront is low. The low energy indicates a lack of motivation. The pipe symbolizes satisfaction, comfort and contentment in life. The fact that I refuse to smoke it indicates I feel none of those things or am not open to receiving them.

The fact that I can’t see the stars as brilliantly symbolizes my life outlook. Life is dull rather than brilliant. The ice on the road indicates I am not feeling that I am making progress in life. Ice skating means I need to proceed with caution in some situation or relationship.

Finally, the fact that I do not take the opportunity presented and shift into a different, higher scene, indicates my overall feelings toward life at this point in my journey.


Lucid to OBE: Visit to an Astral World

Prior to bed last night I had third-eye and heart chakra activity, though very subtle. With it came a visit from a guide along with a feeling/message that I am in the midst of a “shift” that will take approximately 2-3 days. I’m not even sure what this means or why I suddenly knew it but it is what it is.

I did a little meditation that included the Breath of Fire which I did for about a minute or so and then fell asleep quite quickly after that.

Lucid to OBE: Visit to an Astral World

I had a full night of dreams, the first of which was one about my ex-BIL which was very strange being I haven’t seen or heard from him since before 2011. I am not going to recount that dream at this time, though. Instead I want to go into a very interesting OBE I had early this morning.

After waking at 5am I fell back to sleep and entered into a dream where I was sitting inside an elementary classroom with a teacher and her students. I was waiting for another class to come in so I could go over to the next classroom. They were delayed so I sat down and waited. The entire time I was very sleepy and dozed on and off. I recall having a pillow and nice, warm blanket wrapped around me.

At some point I went to the other classroom and peeked in the window of the closed door. There was a class underway and they were watching a movie. I knew it was history class and didn’t want to interrupt. As I stood by the door a past coworker said something to me from their classroom. I recognized him and his joke and laughed before walking into the classroom.

I sat down to watch the movie with the class and promptly fell asleep. I was embarrassed to be so tired and sleeping on the job but at the same time I didn’t care. I remember no one else cared either. There is memory here of a teacher being pregnant and getting sick as well as a discussion about the previous teacher who had made the joke. I remember telling someone I thought he was interested in me when we worked together so many years ago.

Through all of this I kept trying to wake up and would for a bit and then fall back to sleep. Someone was asking me to try and stay awake. Eventually I listened and got up. I ended up following some kind of trail of string through the door outside into the night.

This is when I became suddenly very lucid. I looked up at the night sky and knew I was OOB. Everything was very real and my vision crystal clear. The sky was magnificent! I could see all the galaxies swirling and the sight of it took my breath away.

At this point I decided to try and fly. I couldn’t at first. It felt like I was pulled down and my leaps into the air brought me back down quickly. However, I convinced myself I could fly and was in the air very quickly after that. I flew up and over the trees leaving the building I was at behind without looking back. There was someone accompanying me the entire time I flew but I couldn’t see them. They spoke to me, guiding and teaching me throughout the experience to come. I am not sure if the guide was male or female.


As I glided along through the star-filled sky I began to feel a slight nudging upward toward the stars. I recognized that my guide was asking me to “surrender” to the experience. There was something he/she wanted to show me. Without a second thought I let go and felt my body accelerate up toward the stars and away from the Earth. I remember saying to my guide, “Take me out into space. It’s okay. I have done it before.”

I lost my astral sight at this point and my astral body seemed to expand or maybe I just ceased to exist in form because I was lost to myself briefly while the transition took place. In the blackness I was totally at ease and began to laugh gleefully. There was also the sensation of spinning and flipping so fast that eventually I felt to be not moving at all.

My vision came on suddenly and I found myself high over planet Earth looking down on what appeared to be never-ending forests of green. We (my guide and I) were soaring like birds over the most beautiful Earth I had ever seen. There seemed to be no humans anywhere! We flew at such great speed that I saw the Earth’s curvature as we moved over her. We seemed to be at the juncture between Earth and space, right on the edge of the atmosphere.

Fully expecting to shift upward and out into space I was surprised when my guide motioned for me to look down. When I looked down a visual appeared in front of my eyes. It was like a time ticker and it said very clearly, “250,000”. I said to my guide, “This is 250,000 years ago!” Then he/she indicated I should continue to focus on the trees. As I did a small, white rectangle appeared in the thick forest below me. It was as if someone took a map and placed it on top of the green. It said, “ISRAEL” on it but as I read it I also heard and saw, “PALESTINE”.

Not really understanding what it meant I had no time to consider my question because I was taken swiftly down. The trees thinned and before I knew it I was hovering in front of a building made of packed sand and mud.

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We hovered in front of the building which looked somewhat like what one would think the old temples of ancient times might look like. It was very tall and made with precision. I remember saying to my guide, “Is it a ship?” He/she told me, “This was before ships were made.” I remember thinking, “Of course! They are miles from water.” Yet now as I think of it I believe “ship” may have been in reference to something else.

Somehow I knew the type of building it was and even gave it a name. Now I cannot recall the name but it was a gathering place, sort of like a community center but also a place where “government” meetings were held.

We were enormous compared to the building and I was able to take my giant astral hand and open the tiny door to the building. I peered inside to try and see but only saw a second doorway behind the first. The experience was strange because I seemed to be a giant and the building a mere toy in comparison.

My guide continued to talk to me and somehow I ended up talking to him/her about the places where people gathered to eat. I shrank instantly and then appeared next to a building that was mostly outside with a kitchen area underneath what looked like large tree roots that spread out in all directions.

I found myself standing at a bar next to several women in a busy cafe environment, though it was not like any cafe I had ever been to. On the bar was a plate of food but I didn’t recognize any of it but recall thinking it was similar to Moroccan food. A woman to my right seemed like a mother figure and was speaking with a thick accent. I remember thinking it German but it was out of place with the setting. The women to my left was the owner of the cafe and was talking about a man and a woman who would soon arrive. She said their names and I stopped and asked her to repeat them to me. She did and I continued to listen in on their conversation for a while. The woman to my right was telling me the name of the dish of food, specifically a small, greenish-looking side dish that resembled seaweed. Out of the blue I thought, “I need to remember the name of these people”. So I asked the woman on my left to tell me their names again, apologizing for my forgetfulness. She told me but seemed annoyed but hid it well. I then turned and asked the woman on my right her name and repeated it. It was similar to Piper but I saw it spelled and it the pronunciation was not the same.

I stood there watching the cafe and thinking it very strange and different from what I am use to. I asked what was on the menu for the week and she said, “We have the same thing every day.” This really was odd to me and I remember thinking to myself, “They eat the same thing all the time?” It seemed boring to me.

Suddenly I knew what the woman was thinking. It was not obvious but I felt it. She was thinking, “I wish they would stop coming here.” “They” meant people like me, travelers. The feeling from her was that we “travelers” don’t follow the rules and always interrupt things.

I called her on it instantly and said, “I’m not like the others.” I was very abrupt when I said it and the woman recognized that I had heard her thoughts. The feeling from her was slight embarrassment. She did not know I could hear what she was thinking. Unperturbed I shifted out of the scene. I don’t know if I did this intentionally or not but I felt unwanted when I shifted so I suspect with the feeling came a decision to let them be. My feelings were not hurt and I had no considerations about leaving other than to give them what they wanted.

I shifted into the building I had been inspecting before, only this time I was inside of it. As I walked through I noted that it felt somewhat like a church but not like any church I had ever been in. To my left was a hallway that curved off and I could not see where it led. To my right was an area set aside for gatherings and in it was a large, deli case with different foods inside. Children were sitting and eating parfaits topped with whipped cream and cherries. There were squares of cloth with children’s names posted on the walls. It felt like a classroom and cafeteria and church all in one.

As I walked through I was thinking how strange it was to be in this place. Everything was so foreign and it was definitely not “my” place in that the people there all seemed to know one another but no one knew me. I wondered why I was there but my guide did not answer me so my mind wandered. I saw a dark haired boy smiling as he gazed upon a gigantic sundae he was about to eat. His eyes were alight with anticipation. I knew there was nothing else on his mind except the delicious feast he was about to have.

Seeing the boy reminded me of my friend and I wondered aloud, “Maybe I will see him here?” When I thought this I asked myself, “What would I do if I saw him?” With these thoughts I felt myself grow unstable in the environment. All went dark and I soon felt my physical body laying in bed.


As I lay in bed wondering about my OBE the guide who had been with me for the entirety of the experience asked me, “What did you think?” I said back, “I don’t know what to think. What was that?” Honestly, I was unimpressed but I’m not sure why. Had such an astral trip happened back in 2006 I would have been excited. For the last couple of years, though, OBEs have been “boring” me unless they include some kind of fantastic astral meeting that incites Kundalini energy. lol

Without needing to be told, I knew I had been taken to an astral world, one created by a group from a similar time period and area of the planet. In this case, the area where current day Israel and Palestine are located. I have no idea if the people were of that culture or not as I could not place their accents and the food and culture were unfamiliar to me. Similarly, I know little to nothing of the current culture of that area and people.

I have visited astral worlds before and had experience similar reactions by the inhabitants. They tolerate visitors but would rather they not be there. If visitors do happen upon their world they prefer they follow their “rules”, whatever they may be. Some worlds are more tolerant than others. This one was fairly tolerant but had not anticipated that I would hear their thoughts. In hindsight it was all very funny, especially the woman’s reaction. LOL I suspect she could hear my thoughts the entire time, but I had nothing to hide anyway. I don’t think she liked hearing that I thought her world was boring. Hahaha

In response to my thoughts, my guide related that the trip had been a lesson. I didn’t understand it, though, and was honest about the type of lessons I prefer. I asked to have more experiences where I feel Home and connected. I asked to get to experience that connection in waking reality on a full-time basis. I told her I was ready to try; eager in fact.

She reminded me that I was not ready still and I reluctantly agreed, though I am not sure why I’m not ready yet. It has something to do with timing and maturity, though not human maturity. She reminded me that time passes quickly and to not dwell on the passage of it for it will only make it seem to pass much slower.

For some reason the magnetic pull toward Home has been stronger than usual and with it has come the familiar frustration of knowing I cannot act on it. There comes with this daydreams and wishful thinking. It is only human and I won’t judge myself for wanting what I want. It is obvious what my current path and position is and I am accepting of it. But I still enjoy a good daydream now and then. 🙂

FYI: I Googled temples in Israel and the Temple of Jerusalem looks a hell of a lot like the building I saw in my projection. Similarly the images of food I found looked similar to what I saw at the cafe.

OBEs – Lost Count

I got a wonderful morning surprise of 1.5 hours OOB. 🙂

Before I go into what happened I wanted to add that I find it no coincidence that the number of lucid dreams and OBEs I’ve had has increased since I took a break from my exercise routine. In observing my OBE patterns it’s obvious that when I am not exercising I have more OBEs/lucid dreams than when I am.

OBEs – Lost Count….

I went to bed nauseous but never got sick. I’m not sure what caused it. I attended my SIL’s baby shower and had several Izze drinks which I think were the culprit.

I woke at 3am from a dream that I have now forgotten but I know it was important because I reminded myself to remember. Yet I forgot. Ugh! I do remember asking to go OOB, though.

Woke again at 6am and felt disappointed because I had not gone OOB. Requested it again and went back to sleep.

It seemed like seconds only before I was rolling out of my sleeping body. I do not recall feeling vibrations but something alerted me to being able to exit. Once OOB I was in an unfamiliar house and my vision was on-again, off-again and shifty. I remember asking for my vision to clear but it was not listening to me. My vision seemed to have it’s own agenda as did the entirety of this experience.

I spent most of the OBE trying to get my vision to turn on and walking around blindly through the house. When I would do something that was not allowed I would shift back into my body temporarily and then shift right back out and back into the scene. This happened more times than I can count now – at least 7.

I encountered several others while in the house – men and women. There was an entire backstory to one man who I was interested in “calling” to the house. Apparently he was a coworker who I got along well with and we would meet up to have sex every now and then. lol I remember being pleased with the arrangement and wishing he were there so we could “play”. I remember seeing him in my memories and then trying to fit him in with my current life by placing the faces of the men I’ve been with. It didn’t work out and confused me a bit, like my astral mind and my physical mind were in conflict.

At one point I managed to go out a window where my vision turned on brilliantly but then faded and became hazy as if part of a psychedelic trip. There were others outside waiting for me and I greeted them warmly. One was a woman and I laughed when I saw her saying, “You came instead.” Then tried to kiss her and she dematerialized the minute I reminded myself that anything sexual was a waste of my time. Again it seemed like two versions of myself were in conflict.

When I turned to look with my newly found vision an entire scene opened up of mountains covered in a heavy fog. It reminded me of the Smokey Mountains and I was immediately in awe leaping up into the air to fly over the tops of them. The heavy fog would not dissipate despite my asking and willing it to but it didn’t prevent me from seeing the beautiful Fall colors of the foliage below me. The more I flew the more I felt pulled as if by a magnet up toward the sky. I said aloud, “Stop!” and the motion stopped but then I felt to be grabbed by both of my feet and pulled at high speeds across the sky. I didn’t resist but the speed was increasing so quickly that I closed my eyes and ended up temporarily back in body.

When I re-entered the scene I was again inside the house. My vision was spotty and it seemed like I had heaps of towels or blankets over my head. I kept peeling them off layer by layer but there was always more.

At one point my vision turned on suddenly as a portly man with reddish blonde hair came toward me to kiss me. He said, “You don’t like what you see, do you?” I said, “No” because he was not attractive to me. He attempted to kiss me but I again had the distinct recognition that sex of any kind here was a waste of my time yet I was aware of a part of me that missed it. In fact she said to me, “But it is a lot of fun!” LOL The other part was like, “Yeah but not now.” The me that was interested in sex was wanting to ignite the Kundalini but going about it the wrong way and I knew it. The part that wanted sex then mentioned my waking life to me saying it was a shame that I was not taking advantage of my husband who was “right there”. lol

After all this I had some excursions out the front door that were uneventful. Every time I went outside my vision would turn on and then quickly off again and I would end up returning to my body for a short while. One time when outside my vision showed something surreal rather than the trees and grass that should have been there. It was like pink swirls that moved and shifted with other colors; a psychedelic dreamscape.

Eventually I was thinking, “I don’t know what to do. I should just wake up.” I had gotten very bored. Yet my thought did nothing and I unable to shift back into my body despite trying to open my physical eyes. I realized then that someone was trying to tell/show me something. I said, “I’m not allowed to leave am I?” I paused feeling the answer was, “Yes”, and asked, “What do you want?”

My vision turned on as if I had said the magic word and I was standing in the middle of a golden hued living room. To my left was a TV. It was on playing cartoons, specifically Lego NinjaGo. The subtitles were on but the characters were speaking English. I could understand the cartoon as well as read the subtitles.

The longer I stared at the TV the more vivid it became which is not usual. Usually if I stare at something for too long I end up losing my vision or back in my body. Curious, I looked closer at the subtitles. Very clearly I saw words appear. It read, “Ask a question”.

Thinking it was the coolest thing I had ever seen I was delighted and wondered, “What should I ask?” The question that came out my mouth was, “Are my husband and I going to separate?” I saw distinctly at the bottom of the golden colored screen written in white letters, “Yes.”

Not believing I actually got an answer I asked, “How much longer will we be together?” I saw the number 72. I thought, “Weeks. It has to be weeks” because I had no idea what 72 meant. It could be that I am 72 years old when we are separated by death for all I knew!

To clarify I asked, “Does that mean we will be together for 72 more weeks?” I saw the number again but swear it was 70 instead of 72.

Something didn’t feel right yet the screen was still vivid, the cartoon still playing and subtitles flashing. I knew I wasn’t asking “the right” questions but my mind was blank. So I said, “Show me in a chart then.” The screen went to a solid gold color and then a chart began to draw itself in front of me. It was a bar-graph type chart I think but by the end it looked more like a staircase being drawn from right to left and moving down step by step. Then two-and-a-half steps were colored in slowly starting with the lowest step.

I thought, “2.5….What does that mean?”

Fed up with the confusing answers I was getting and not knowing what to do next I thought, “I should just wake up.” With that my vision began to fade out and was replaced with hypnagogia – millions of white bubbles on a black background that seemed to float upward.

Recognizing the hypnagogia meant I was back in my body, I opened my eyes and rolled back onto my back.


Sometimes when I have these experiences I am “trapped” into a scene for a specific reason. I have been told in various ways that I am there to “see” something. Sometimes a guide will come into the experience and tell me directly, other times I will get hints such as in this experience.

In these instances I have learned to look for the symbolism to find the messages I am being asked to pay attention to. My vision was the main message in these OBEs. When they (my guides/HS) want me to see a certain thing and I am not cooperative then my vision is black. If I follow their lead then I am able to see.

The fog over the mountains is another clue. I wanted it to be clear and sunny but it remained foggy. Fog symbolizes confusion, uncertainty and worry. I am not seeing something in my life as it is. Mountains represent a higher realm of consciousness, knowledge and spiritual truth.

Being pulled by my feet could have been a sign that I am feeling a loss of independence and control or maybe it is a message to stop trying to control everything.

The whole time I was aware of two aspects of myself. One was very playful and interested in sex for some reason. She kept reminding me how much fun sex can be. lol The other was more focused and serious, very analytical in comparison. What is interesting is they both felt like me but I identified more with the serious one. It seemed like I was intent on a goal and did not want the other me to distract me from it.

As for the TV portion of the OBE, I can’t recall ever having such an experience and I am not sure what the answers mean. It is likely that the screen was just saying what I wanted it to.


2 OBEs and More Tears

Today the repairman is returning to finish the repairs on my broken refrigerator. He needs to replace the heater and thermostat so it doesn’t freeze up again. When he left last Friday he asked me to unplugged the fridge 8 hours before his arrival today at 9am. That meant either turning it off before bed or waking in the night to do it. I opted to wake during the night. Prior to bed I asked for more clarification as to what is going on with me. Still feel unsure of this “process” I am going through.

I meant to wake at midnight using my internal clock but ended up waking at 2:30am instead. After unplugging the fridge I was wide awake and it took me some time to settle down. I should have known I would end up going OOB, but I didn’t ask to do so.

OBE: Visit From MIL

I vaguely recall rising up from my body in bed and traveling downstairs to the kitchen. I was not fully lucid when I did so and believed I was awake repeating the steps I’d taken earlier in the night. When I got to the kitchen I saw that someone had been there and plugged the refrigerator back in. This upset me and I tried to figure out what had happened. I noticed some things laying here and there (bags and such) indicating that my mother-in-law had paid us a visit after we all went to bed. This isn’t uncommon for her so made sense. She often leaves us loaves of bread and other groceries for the kids and will clean up the kitchen if she has the energy.

I turned toward the living room still upset over the fridge but I never unplugged it. Instead I noticed there was an opening in the living area where normally the fireplace would be. Another entire room extended for many feet and the floors of both were carpeted. Instantly I knew something wasn’t right and said to myself, “This is a dream”.

Nothing about the feel of my energy body or the dream really changed after this realization. I already had my full perceptions but had just not been focused on them. My vision was the one I was most focused on at the time anyway. It brightened slightly and I decided to explore this new section of my house.

I floated into the new space and noticed someone sitting in a chair facing away from me. I recognized my MIL and went up to her. Facing her confirmed it was her and I remember speaking to her but she just stared at me zombie-like. I remember saying, “Wake up! You’re asleep!” She didn’t respond, just stared into the distance as if preoccupied with something else. My last thought before returning to my body was that she looked so similar to what she looked like in waking life.

When I came back into my body it was ablaze with a comforting energy. I was surprised I had gone OOB and amused that my preoccupation with the coming appointment and refrigerator had been the focus of the OBE. All I wanted was to get some much needed sleep so I turned to my side and drifted off.



Again, not fully lucid, I walked into a gym (apply what has been learned) that was familiar. Inside things had been moved and the equipment that was there before was mostly gone. I noticed people standing on circles (cycles, repetition) painted on the floor. They were spaced as if in some kind of grid and all facing in the same direction. Not letting this bother me, I went toward the dumbbell rack but did not use any of them. Instead I was holding onto what resembled black, weighted handcuffs (feeling held back, trapped). I was talking to someone doing exercises with them but can’t recall what I was saying.

A man approached me and asked me when I would be done. I remember being irritated at him but finishing quickly. When I got up I sat in a chair and got out a computer (information). On it I could see the entire layout of the building. Circles represented each person and they moved like chess pieces (loss of control).

A man sitting next to me spoke to me about the ceremony that was going on. One of the owners of the gym was retiring (transitioning, endings) and they were setting up for a celebration. I saw the owner as he walked in. He was graying and had a pleasant face and energy. Someone asked me to put away my computer, so I did, opting to get out my phone which was the size of a tablet. The man had mentioned a word that sounded like Jockey – NOKEY – so I did a Google search for it. The results showed information about baseball (contentedness and peace of mind) and I saw a large 15% that took up my entire tablet.

A woman rudely interrupted me telling me I had some nerve still using my cell phone when the celebration was about to begin. She demanded I leave, saying I had broken the rules and was no longer allowed inside. I stood up and told her it was fine and that I wasn’t a member anyway and had just come in to check it out but found it changed and unusable. I was just as rude to her as she was to me.

She followed me outside. Her demeanor changed when we were alone and she turned more friendly, apologizing for the changes and asking me for suggestions to improve it. She asked me what gym I frequented that I liked. I thought about it and said, “Lifetime Fitness” (which is a gym in real life but one I’ve never been to). Something about saying this brought me into full lucidity and the word “lifetime” echoed in my mind.

I turned and walked away. When I looked to where I was heading I saw beautiful green hills and a vast, sparkling lake. There were people here and there seemingly floating across the fields and water. The sky was brilliant with a rising sun whose rays were illuminating everyone with a silvery sheen. The whole scene sparkled like a million jewels.

I noticed a man was with me at this time. It was like the woman had morphed into a man. He remained with me and spoke with me for the remainder of the experience.

I stopped, filled with awe and said, “It is SO beautiful!” My heart began to overflow and I burst into tears. The scene changed and I could tell I was shifting away from it. In front of my eyes gray clouds floated in and covered the brilliant landscape. Tears poured out of my eyes, my body shuddered with intense vibrations and my heart stung.

In the in-between I lingered for some time. I could sense the presence of someone to my right. The vibrations were still strong and hypnagogic images of millions of tiny, yellow circles flooded my vision, pulsating and breathing in unison. I was still crying, my heart inundated with energy and my entire body pulsing and vibrating. My tears were a mixture of joy and grief. I understood the messages from the OBE and the male presence acknowledged this.

He said to me, “I’ve loved you for a long time.” It reminded me of the song that had been sung to me only a few nights prior: “Don’t you know I’m in love with you. I will be with you for a long time”.

I asked him who he was and the name “Chris” came to mind. Not recognizing the name I just allowed the comforting vibrations to wash over me. He spoke to me at some length about my sadness and exhaustion, telling me, “We will help you” and “It will be okay”. Throughout his messages tears would erupt sporadically. He said that my grief must be experienced and not suppressed.

At one point there was a brilliant circle of light that I identified as a full moon. It got so large that it took up my entire vision and it seemed to intensify the vibrations. Eventually I realized it was not the moon at all but a giant light. I had seen it before while OOB and usually it is associated with E.T.s.

While we communicated two songs came into my mind. The first was the song, All of Me and the specific part I heard over and over was, “My head’s under water but I’m breathing fine. You’re crazy and I’m out of mind. ‘Cause all of me loves all of you……’Cause I give you all of me and you give me all of you.”

The other song was Hold My Hand. “I’m ready for this” repeating over and over.

It didn’t take long for me to understand the second OBE. The messages were obvious. The scene at the gym is me being tired of repetitive cycles, feeling trapped by them and looking for a way to end them. The NOKEY word is actually – No Key – no admittance, no entry, no access. I can’t go where I wish to go. The 15% is still a mystery. I suspect it may indicate my “battery” level, how far I’ve come or where I am at currently in whatever this process is. Maybe I am 15% way through a process that will bring me peace and contentedness? The “Lifetime” reference is to this lifetime.

There was a hell of a lot of energy swirling around me after the last OBE. The entire experience left me unable to return to sleep. I have no idea who this “Chris” person is, either. He was on my right, which suggests he is not a guide. My guides are typically to my left. His messages indicate he knows me, loves me and wants to help. I did not feel any particular connection to him, though.

My considerations now after these experiences are that I refuse to read anything into any of it, no matter how profound. Even if my heart blasts open again and the bliss is all encompassing there will be no reaction or longing or hope this time because I know how destructive the after-effects are. To attach to the feeling is destructive and I don’t think I can survive another round. I pray God spares me from ever feeling it again.

Lucid Dream and OBE: Over and Over Again

After a two month WP break this morning’s activity prompted me to shift back here. Why? Well, you’ll see, but mainly because while I was in the midst of the lucid dream below I remember saying, “I need to remember this, to write this down and share it”.

If you’ve been following me on Blogger then you know what’s been going on these past couple of months. If you haven’t been, sorry, I’m not going to do a recap except to say spiritual experiences have been low, dream recall almost nonexistent, and focus has been on physicality and living life.

Up until two nights ago things have been quiet in dreamland. Woke up a lot last night. Assuming it has to do with the full moon.

Lucid Dream: Message

I was in school but can’t recall now the specifics of the situation. The next thing I know I am in a room that has no form or features and is dark except where I am. It is almost like I have a dim spotlight on me. I feel a distinctly familiar feeling and think, “I am about to meet someone.” The feeling brings on full lucidity. I think to myself, “Capricorn” and quickly conclude he must be a Capricorn. I’m not sure why I think this but I have no doubt of what I Know.

The feeling intensifies. It is the feeling of connection to another and it is strong, but not so strong it scares me. I can only describe it as an all-over body vibration where mine and the other person’s vibration aligns. The feeling is like my body is a living symphony where all the individual instrument parts are being played perfectly. My soul was literally singing.

A man appears from the shadows. When I see him I know he’s the one I’ve been feeling. He says to me, “I have a message for you.” Inside I begin to freak out a bit, anticipating the message and wishing he had not said that word “message” because it makes me anticipate what is coming next. I expected to wake up because I could feel my anticipation rising and my nervousness taking over. Yet I didn’t. Instead, he approached me and placed his hand on my left shoulder. It was so solid and real it surprised me. I looked up at him and could see him clearly. He was no one I recognized. In fact, he was quite plain in terms of human appearance with small red bumps (pimples?) covering his face, but the feeling I got from him was gentle and loving. He had medium brown hair and light eyes. In recalling him now he could have passed for my father in his younger years, though I did not see my father in him during the experience.

I wait for his message and he draws closer to me. He gently pulls me toward him and we hug. I feel every bit of it as real as in the physical yet this doesn’t wake me up. The hug is so wonderful, too, reminding me of how hugs felt when I was a child after being lost for a while.

When we are done hugging I keep looking up at him, focusing on his face trying to memorize every detail. He says to me, “You are better than this. You don’t need him.” I feel instantly humbled by his statement. It was like I had expected him to say it and I knew exactly what he was talking about. I replied, “You’re talking about (insert person’s name) right?” He says, “Yes.” I hang my head and say, “I know but it is so hard. I don’t want to be here. I can’t do this anymore.” He says, “Why don’t you leave then?” I say to him, “I don’t think I could do that.” He says, “Why couldn’t you?”

I have to interrupt the dream here to say our conversation is not what it seems. Don’t draw any conclusions here thinking we are talking about my husband because we aren’t. During the conversation I did mention a name but when I awoke I understood it to mean I don’t need anyone – male, female, or otherwise. When he says “Why don’t you leave?” I interpret it to mean “leave this life”, not a person, place or situation. In hindsight I believe the conversation has multiple meanings referring to multiple situations in my life.

There is a discussion then about my time on Earth and the choices I have made and the choices I have yet to make. Most of the specifics are lost to me now but I recall seeing a block resembling the days on a calendar but I think the blocks represent something larger, maybe years or lifetimes but I’m not sure. I recall knowing I could finish early, two blocks early, and that it would be okay if I did. The feeling I remember having the most was complete exhaustion and wanting to exit this life as soon as possible. There were so many words exchanged here but all that is left of mine is a feeling of being unable to progress past a certain point. If I had to put it into words it would be that I just can’t push past my feelings of responsibility towards those I love or past the feeling that whatever I do, I lose. I remember the man being very sympathetic and there being the message from him that I knew this might happen when I planned this life. We don’t always have the strength in life that we think we will have while we are in Spirit. The feeling of disappointment in myself was very strong. No matter how hard I try to do what I came here to do, I seem unable. It’s as if that part of me is broken.

The next thing I remember was him asking me, “How do you want to go?” I contemplated this aloud saying, “I don’t care” because I just wanted it over with, then changed my mind because I saw several scenarios flash through my mind – car accident, freak accident, suicide.  I saw my family’s reaction to these and it wasn’t good. I told him, “I prefer to go in my sleep. An aneurysm maybe…something that won’t hurt and won’t traumatize my family.”

Then I heard noises-off. It sounded like my daughter calling my name. By this time I was laying down with the man, curled up inside his embrace and very comfortable there with him. Safe. I knew hearing her meant he was about to go. I told him, “I don’t want you to go yet.” But I called back to her and felt his embrace around me lighten until it was gone. Yet I could still hear him. I asked him, “What is your name?” He said, “I have many names, as do you.” I understood this meant so much more than my human mind can comprehend yet in that moment I had no confusion whatsoever.

I lost some lucidity then and had a dream-within-a-dream. I saw a blonde woman resembling me. She laid down behind the back wheels of an SUV placing her head right behind a tire. The car backed up and crushed her head. The people inside the car panicked and got out. I was watching from a distance and saw the woman rise up out of her body and watch.

Then I was talking to the woman. We were face to face and I felt overwhelming love for her. I put my hands on her face and looked at her, smiling. I don’t remember everything we said but I do recall saying to her, “I love you” and my heart overflowing with love for her. We embraced and then I woke up feeling myself settle back into my sleeping body.

Even after I awoke I could still sense the energy of the man from my dream. He was still around me so I asked him again, “What is your name?” I felt a reply and slowly it formed in my mind – Sebastian. The sense at this time was that I was surrounded by love and it’s form is incomprehensible to my human mind. What I see in my dreams and in visions is nothing compared to the true forms of these Beings. I heard, “We are Many” and took a deep breath. Elohim. I knew They would come back. But I was/am so tired, so completely spent energetically, spiritually, physically, emotionally, that the thought of being “crazy” caused absolutely no reaction in me.

I couldn’t sleep afterward, tossing and turning because I was trying to remember as many details of the experience as I could. There were moments when I would drift and get visions, flashes of names or scenarios. I saw the name, “David” written clearly and remembered an entire dream from many nights before. Then I heard Ezekiel, Gabriel, and other Biblical names. I began to hear an old hymnal – Ten Thousand Angels – “He could have called, ten thousand angels, but he died alone for you and me….” I knew I was being told I had angels watching over me.

OBE: Over and Over Again

I almost got out of bed at 5:30am because I was so wide awake but instead I closed my eyes to meditate.

The next thing I recall was being inside a school sitting at a desk. I knew I had missed many classes. There were several “bad” students present. One male student was sent to get my mail and deliver it to me. Yet he didn’t give it to me but kept it and went through it. I went up to him and said, “You know it’s a federal offense to take someone’s mail.” Eventually I got my mail back and pulled out a large, wooden “S”, from inside an envelope. I knew it represented my last name.

My teacher told me that I needed to update my computer. I had a laptop in front of me and told her I had already updated it from home. I went to a seat and sat down for a while after that. The seat reminded me of a seat in a movie theater. As I sat there I entered into a meditative trance-type state. I can’t remember what I was thinking until the vibrations began to wake me from my meditative state. They were super intense, wrapping around me lovingly centered around my heart. I wanted to sink into them and let them take me away, into oblivion, when I thought suddenly, “I’m having a stroke.” Then I realized the energy and vibrations I was feeling were indicative of being OOB. I sat up and out of my dream body and faced myself, touching my own shoulder. I don’t remember looking at my face just being aware of being outside of the body I had just been in.

I immediately felt freer and happier. Looking to explore, I wandered out of the large, movie-theater-type place and into another room. Inside I found a large group of people standing together in formation seeming to be rehearsing something. They were all wearing what appeared to be costumes of other-worldly creatures. Some looked to be from the Renaissance while others looked like fairies or creatures only found in fairy realms. My attention went to a very tall, handsome man in front of me. I can’t remember his costume now but when I saw him I was intrigued. His eyes and mine locked and I smiled. I stood and watched them practice for a while, relaxed and enjoying myself. All of them were a good foot or more taller than me.

Then a young brown haired woman approached me. We knew each other. She began talking to the other me who apparently had followed me into the room. I interrupted their conversation and said to her, “It’s me. She (the other me) is me. You and I know each other, too.” The explanation continued but is lost to me now. Apparently I am able to split off from myself and interact independently of my other selves. This time I remember seeing the other me but now all I remember is a blur of her blue shirt and her shoulder length hair which seemed light brown/dark blonde.

I told the brown haired girl, “Come with me. I want to show you some things.” The girl followed. I was laughing by this time and jumped up into the air with her. I said, “We can fly, you know.” We lifted up and then drifted back down. Taking her hand I lifted her up with me and then we laid on our backs, floating. We glided for a while, facing the ceiling and then going through the windows out into the night. We could see the sky full of stars and I was laughing and singing by this time as was my friend.

We continued to float and then began to fly out and over the fields. I was singing about life and how we as eternal Beings live forever, experiencing lifetime after lifetime. The fields below me turned into giant life stories in the form of realistic books built into the scenery. The hills seemed to come alive with moving pictures of lives from different times and places. I sang, “We do it (life) over and over again….” As I sang I turned the pages of the Earth-book showing life after life after life. I did all of this full of a child-like joy.

It was around this time that I began to come back into my body. I felt the familiar energy of re-entry and my heart was beating rapidly.

A song was in my head when I woke up, “I’m still breathing. I’m still breathing. I’m alive.”

Putting it Together

The “Capricorn” reference was related to the month of December, not the man in the lucid dream. I don’t remember when I realized this but when I awoke I recalled seeing stars in the sky, as if being shown astrology and the time of the year when Capricorn rules. I also recall saying something in astrological terminology to the man. The term I used was “aspect” but I can’t make sense of what I said. All I recall is that I said some aspect would affect me and it is related to Capricorn. My feeling upon waking was that it would happen in December and I felt a bit sad because that time of the month has been bringing all kinds of crap into my life since 2015! I wish I could just skip the month this year rather than face whatever it is bringing me this time around.

I also want to reassure you all that though it appears I am planning my own demise, I do not feel upset, sad or otherwise concerning the conversation with the man in the lucid dream nor did I have any such feelings during the discussion regarding exiting this life. It was just a matter-of-fact conversation, like I got a sneak peek into what goes on in dreamtime – the planning and such.

There was also a message in the lucid dream I forgot to mention. I was told, “You are primed”. I have heard that before and so my reaction was not positive. I understand that it means I have been prepared/prepped for something – a task, situation, or experience.

Finally, there was a return of that familiar E.T. feeling that I have not had in a very long time. It is that multidimensional-connected-Source-Love-Oneness feeling. lol Hard to describe.

Kachina Dream and OBEs

I’m still sick. Yesterday I felt like I had taken a sleeping pill – sluggish and tired all day. This morning my eyes are watering and bloodshot on top of the wonderful congestion that never seems to end. Didn’t I just have this stupid cold? WTF?

On top of being sick all day yesterday, I couldn’t shake a feeling that something is about to happen. It was a “heads up” feeling but not one that makes my stomach sink or gets me nervous. My guidance has been mostly quiet, but then I’ve been shutting down their communication during the day because I am too sick to care what it is they have to say and I don’t trust my monkey mind right now. When I’m sick, the monkey mind (Ego) comes out to play more than ever and I really don’t want to chance it interfering with communication from my guidance.

Despite being sick still, my dreams were abundant and I got to go OOB this morning several times.

Dream: Kachina

I was with a group of people who were putting on a play (life roles) in an amphitheater (spreading of knowledge). I was standing in line with some others and felt distinctly like a student. In my hand I was holding a big, beautiful rose quartz crystal (wholeness). I was explaining to another student how I had drilled a hole through it and placed a candle wick in the center (unfulfilled). Yet it was most obviously a crystal, not a candle. The other student was sharing her creation with me as well but I can’t recall it now.

Outside everyone was preparing for the play. It was a beautiful day with a clear blue sky. I looked up at the bleachers (reflecting on goals), silver and shining in the sun, and saw several groups of people settling in their seats. There was no concession stand so the food and drinks were just sitting on the bleachers. People were taking stuff without paying so I stopped and handled the situation telling them everything was 50¢.

I never saw the play. Instead I went with a man in a truck (hard work) to another part of the island to search for something. I can’t recall what now but I remember seeing something blue. At some point in the dream I saw a woman dressed in a white (purity) gown in the cabin of the truck. The truck began to move on it’s own and she began to get concerned. Eventually the truck crashed (painful experience). I found the woman laying in a pile of thousands of smooth, white, shiny discs (wholeness). I went to her, cradling her in my arms, and told her she would be okay. I called her by name – Kachina. I told her I loved her and held her against me. She opened her eyes and looked at me. Relief rushed over me. She was alive! I began to cry.


When I awoke I was crying and my nose was so clogged I couldn’t breathe. The image of the woman laying on the pile of white discs was vivid in my mind along with her name – Kachina. I had that feeling that something big was about to happen but wasn’t sure what. I figured it must have something to do with the Blue Kachina Hopi legend. I remembered I dreamed of it before, back in February of this year. Why was it coming up again?

I drifted into the in-between with questions in my mind and entered into a conversation with my guidance. I saw a white disc very vividly in my mind. It then fell from space into the atmosphere of earth. As it fell, it was burned by the atmosphere and glowed blue like a meteor. I wondered if the blue kachina was likely a capsule of some kind, perhaps a space ship landing on earth? I remember thinking the word “contact” and saying the name “Toba”, or at least I think it was a name.

I came out of the in-between with a start after I said the name Toba to my guide. I figured it must be his name but who knows and I was too sick and congested to care. Yet I knew it was significant so I repeated in my head in order to recall it later.



The next thing I recall is being in a dimly lit house talking to my BIL and SIL about something. I realized I was OOB in the midst of talking to them and shut myself into a bedroom by closing both of the doors leading into it. The room was dimly lit and had blue undertones. I could sense both my physical body and my astral body at the same time. My physical body was struggling to breathe so I often shifted focus to it to adjust my breathing and then would return my focus to my astral body without losing lucidity.

I was talking with someone the entire time I was OOB. I never saw him but his responses were audible, though not enough to trigger me into waking up. I also felt distinctly male throughout this OBE. I also knew I was dark skinned.

At one point in the conversation I lost lucidity and returned to my body briefly. I could feel the vibrations and shifted immediately right back OOB without incident. However, my body was struggling to breathe, both nostrils clogged and causing major discomfort. I had to tend to this issue or I could not remain OOB. So I returned several times and adjusted the position of the body to compensate. What is amazing to me is that I did this shifting seamlessly and without ever losing contact with my astral self. I thought nothing of it at the time but looking back it amazes me!

When back OOB and while still standing in the bedroom I heard that I needed to replace something. I can’t recall the name now but it was some kind of machine that helped me adjust frequencies. It materialized in front of me. It was black or dark in color and looked like a sea urchin except that its spikes were very long like tentacles. It moved about on its own, its tentacles moving fluidly as if in water. It had a cord coming out of the top center of it that extended vertically up into the air above. I did not look for its source and the alien looking machine (or creature?) did not concern me one bit. In fact, I was completely at ease with it and happy to have it help with “adjustments”.

Now that I had this adjusting machine I opted to leave the bedroom via the ceiling. I succeeded without incident, flying right through the roof and out into the sky. Outside it was still dark. I noted it was not dark where my physical body was and knew I was elsewhere. I seemed not to care where I was, though. Instead I began to sing and fly, looking down on the city below. The conversation I was having with my guidance was flowing through the song I sang. I also heard music in the background. It reminded me of techno music.

I saw a building below that had rows of flowers of all colors surrounding it. I flew down toward it, knowing it was a church. There were people gathered in front of the doors. I wondered if they would see me so flew down and hovered in front of them. They smiled at me. Again I had the distinct feeling I was male and that I knew all of the people standing at the church.

I shifted back into my body quite suddenly and lingered a while, adjusting position again because I could not breathe. My nose was completely clogged and my lungs were screaming for air. While making adjustments I was talking with my guidance. I remember him giving me options on what to do. One option I recall is reviewing a life decision, specifically a relationship.

While we were talking I shifted back OOB to the church scene. This is when I chose to review a life decision. It felt as if I could change things about my life, like I could rewrite it. I said, “I loved her the minute I saw her.” I flew down toward a dark skinned woman but her appearance shifted from a woman into a man. I think this was because I recalled being a woman in this lifetime. I stood in front of the man and put my hands on either side of his face and then kissed him. He kissed back. Then I flew back up and my guidance asked if I would change anything. I said, “No. I loved him from the moment I saw him.” When I said this an image of a lightening bolt appeared on my left forearm.

Once again I was pulled back into my physical body because of breathing issues. I ended up having to cough and this brought me fully back into my body. Then I heard my son pounding on the door and knew I had to get up.