Signs, Messages and Triggers

This is my life
I can choose to accept it
Or I can struggle against it
Whatever I choose is no mistake
But a choice that can be changed
At any time

I have options
though they are limited
by the contracts I’ve agreed to
Sometimes the option outcomes
differ little from one another
It matters not

Damned if I do, damned if I don’t.

Blessed if I do, blessed if I don’t.

It’s all about perspective.

Current Messages and Connections

Quote

Quote from Sense8, season 2: “I’m slowly dying of survival.” This quote resonated with me. It came from episode 6 when one of the sense8’s mentioned how he had been in hiding for 30 years and, though he was surviving, it was a life devoid of meaning or purpose.

Images of Sky

These pictures were taken yesterday on a short road trip to a small town East of where I live. On the way home the sky began to look like gray ocean waves. I was mesmerized by the beauty of it, though, and did not consider it a bad omen. However, I can see how it reflects the emotional state I’ve been in this year. It has often felt like I am drowning.

4/22-4/24 and 12/17

These dates were given to me in the in-between a couple of nights ago. I am not sure of the significance of them but so far 4/22 has me in a very contemplative state. It seems like the past is repeating itself and I am being asked to consider how I want to handle this repetition. I was informed that a meeting will take place on the 23rd, but I am not sure what kind or what for. The 24th has been showing up as significant and connected to the Mayan calendar. However, I was told this is the first day of the last of three sections of the Equinox Portal in the month of May.

As for the 12/17 date, it has been given to me twice now. A friend from Shasta who is an astrologer said this about the December date:

The night of the 17th we have a new Moon conjunct the galactic center setting the tone for a powerful expansive month ahead. This is on the cusp of Saturn entering his own sign Capricorn on the 19th beginning a profound power surge for the next 2 to 3 years. The 17th may be a “meeting” or counsel of the galactics upstairs in preparation for the huge shift that begins on the 19th.

Blinking Aura

Message received two nights ago about my aura was that it was blinking like a strobe light. It caused a reaction in me because I have seen this aura phenomena in people who are nearing and very close to death. My grandfather was one of them. I watched as he went OOB and then would return to the body over and over again. I believe the “blinking” or flashing of the aura that appears much like a strobe light is due to this in/out of body state. However, I have found that others believe it to mean that one’s angels are very close, which could also be true. I have let the message be for now as I am unconcerned one way or the other.

Let Thine Will Be Mine

Received last week and repeated this morning. The message is to allow whatever is to happen, to happen. To trust that I am where I need to be and not assign value or worth to any one experience over the other. They are all equally important and necessary for this journey. Each experience offers its own lesson, its own value, if only I look to find it.

My reaction is mixed. I understand but am furious at the same time. I’m being asked to Trust regardless of what is thrown my way, to accept the good and bad equally. Easy when it’s all “good”, not so much when it turns “bad”. Currently I feel like I have already lived the best part of my life. To live the rest of my life with this ache in my heart is the equivalent of hell to me. My burden to bear alone for the rest of this lifetime. How do I Trust and Allow that?

firefly

Signs from Nature

Firefly –  Landed on the door in front of me in broad day light. Message: Illumination.

Butterfly – Saw a purple Swallowtail butterfly. Thought, “I want him to come see me.” He flew directly toward me, flew around my head for a while, and then flew off. Message: Transformation.

Raccoon – Came to visit a few weeks ago. First time I’ve seen one since moving here in 2014. Last night I had a dream of a dead raccoon hanging up in a garage by a noose. Message: Let go.

Familiar Feeling

The way I am feeling currently takes me back to the year I entered into the darkest part of my Dark Night of the Soul. Back then I felt much as I do now – betrayed, misled and disillusioned. I realized at a later date that the reason for all the upheaval in my life during my Dark Night was because I was unwilling to accept the truth of the situation. I was full of resistance to the point of rebellion. At the time the message I could not accept was that the time was not right for what I wanted and I was to move in another direction while I waited until the time was right. It took me a while to fall into acceptance. Life actually forced me into various upsetting events but once I fell into acceptance things shifted and a path opened up to me. I ended up on a “detour” for 7 years before the timing was right and my spiritual path opened up again to me.

Apparently, “the time is not right” again. I can choose to rebel and resist or I can just allow the path ahead to open up. It seems obvious what I should do but I can’t help but feel outrage at the unfairness of it all. I seem always to be waiting in this life and then, when things finally get good, they last for only a moment and I am waiting again. The “good” times are so few and so fleeting in comparison. For example, after my first awakening I had maybe three good years (1 really exciting one) and then was back to waiting. The wait was 7 years! Three years have passed (2014-2017) with one very exciting and eventful year (2016) and now it looks like I am to wait again. How long? Most likely years. I can’t stand it. I am not patient. Never have been. Knowing a long wait is ahead is excruciating. I want to throw a really, really big tantrum, cross my arms across my chest, turn my back on my guidance and make them pay by following the destructive path (yeah insane right?).  But I know such tantrums only result in more pain on my part. I can go along peacefully or face the consequences.

I’ve been going in and out of insanity for a few weeks now. I will have moments of complete clarity followed by full-on resistance and emotional chaos. I’m super triggered by the events of my life, by people in my life, by memories that surface….everything triggers me. I’m like a bomb waiting to go off and when I explode it’s not pleasant.

Yesterday I woke in complete acceptance and balance. This morning I woke up cussing out my guidance and asking for an “opt out”. This has gotten their attention at least. We’ll see if some revisions can be made. Of course it’s likely when we have our “meeting” I will be the balanced, cooperative me and nothing will be altered at all. I’ll get a pat on the back, congratulations and a job well-done followed up with a “You can do this”.  I’ll be full of love, smiles, and agreement like I usually am when OOB. Big sigh.

 

 

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13 thoughts on “Signs, Messages and Triggers

  1. Karin says:

    Thanks for sharing that. I am sorry to hear about these struggles. I have no answers. I just want to let you know that I can very much relate. The temper tantrums, the cussing, the desire to follow the destructive path. Oh, and how the guides act – I get a nice praise which is immediately followed by the next task. I wonder whether I will get the hang of this surrender thing in this lifetime at all.
    Sending you a compassionate hug!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dayna says:

      Me, too. Surrender is great until it isn’t. lol I feel like a puppet on a string sometimes. Thank you for the hug. I wish I had someone here with me to hug who understands.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Karin says:

        I wish I could be there to hug you. Maybe we meet in dream time. I believe I was visited once by you in a dream. It was after your post about how often we have incarnate in order to help every one else.
        An Asian woman with rainbow colored hair appeared to me in a dream after that posting and told me the same message as in your posting. She was Asian , but somehow I got the impression that it was you.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Dayna says:

        Wow, Karin. It likely was me because I often look Asian when OOB. Thanks for telling me. Rainbow hair , too. lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • Karin says:

        Yeah, rainbow colored hair, but only on the top of the head. The rest of the hair was black. Otherwise I probably would not have identified her as Aslan.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Adam says:

    I totally get it. That type of frustration/waiting/let-down peaked for me late last year and was a big contributor to me deleting my entire blog and refusing to even listen to guidance. Hang in there, Dayna. Even if you gotta give your guides a mental lashing here and there, you can make it through this.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Dayna says:

      I remember that, Adam. I wish you hadn’t deleted your site. I’m familiar with these temporary upsets with my guidance. I don’t blame them at all, actually, but I can get overly caught up in their guidance and forget to just live and feel the answers I am looking for. It is a blessing to be able to hear them like I do in some instances, but in others it can be a curse. Knowing too much about what will be, about the journey and path I have created in this lifetime, upsets the Ego child especially when it is not something she wants (which it rarely is). I was thinking currently that my guidance is trying to “break me” with the experiences I have been having lately. This is not a bad thing but my Ego is a force to reckon with and I am feeling it full-on right now. I have to love her but it is damn hard! I want to punch her in the face. Learning I don’t like some parts of myself too much. I’m a mess. lol

      Liked by 1 person

  3. teleile says:

    You wrote: “Yesterday I woke in complete acceptance and balance. This morning I woke up cussing out my guidance and asking for an “opt out”. This has gotten their attention at least. We’ll see if
    some revisions can be made. Of
    course it’s likely when we have our “meeting” I will be the balanced, cooperative me and nothing will be altered at all. I’ll get a pat on the back, congratulations and a job well-done followed up with a “You can do this”. I’ll be full of love, smiles, and agreement like I
    usually am when OOB. Big sigh.”

    Hahahahaha, I have exactly the same thing! When talking to guides/spirit team at night, I smilingly agree to things that lower, human me absolutely hates, this is a real bugbear of mine. Only last week I threw a tantrum, and bellowed: ‘Get me off this toxic planet NOW, I’ve had enough of it. YOU come down here and try living in 3D for decades!’ 🙂
    But sometimes while human me has been having a rant, in some guide meeting I hear myself cheerfully agreeing to stay longer.

    Once, about 7 years ago, I was having a bad time. REALLY bad. I had hurt my shoulder so was off work for 2 weeks, thus was short of money; I had toothache, my shoulder injury meant that I couldn’t even flick a light switch, I was dealing with some hostile people, the weather was horrible; I’ve forgotten the details now, but every single area of my life was crap.

    At night, when I finally managed a couple of hours’ sleep despite the arm pain, I went OOB, and my star being team asked how I was doing, that is, my human self. I looked down casually and said something like, ‘She’s injured her shoulder, but that doesn’t matter; yeah, she’s fine!’
    I woke up in DISBELIEF, because I was about as far from “fine” as it is possible to be! 😀
    It drives me mad, this. When you’re in the other dimensions, your suffering down here, inner or outer, seems like some piffling thing of no consequence; “Oh, that, it doesn’t matter.” But when you’re having to live through it, it matters very much indeed, doesn’t it? Sigh.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Dayna says:

      Lol good to know I’m not alone. Thanks for sharing. It helps. I have overheard conversations too and it’s so strange how different I am when slammed back here. “Fine” is a common description of how I’m doing, too. Fine translates to “not attempting suicide yet”. 😉

      Like

  4. teleile says:

    Lol, yes!
    I think if they actually saw us making suicide preparations, they’d do something, but anything below that level gets a kind of, ‘Nah, she’s fine.’
    I am glad too to know I’m not the only one who throws a hissy fit occasionally. As you say, it does get their attention, but my guides seem to think I have twenty times the amount of endurance that I really have.

    Ironically, I often think it would help in a way, to get through the frame-by-frame living life in 3D, if I could guarantee to go off visiting amazing worlds every night. You know: ‘Well, at least I have my nighttime adventures.’ But sometimes I don’t go anywhere stunning, and I see why. It’d make life here seem unbearable.
    Some years back, I visited the most amazing planet, I don’t know where it was, but it was beautiful. You know the rather kitschy paintings of Thomas Kincaid? Well, they are really the nearest thing to the beauty and the quality of light there. And I realised that if I went there every night, the contrast with earth life would be so painful that I’d flat out refuse to come back! Sad, but true.

    By the way, I meant to mention, interestingly I woke up a couple of days ago hearing: ‘Let your will be my will’, which is remarkably similar to your message, isn’t it?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dayna says:

      Yes that is interesting! I guess many of us are having to surrender to Divine Will right now. That gentle nudge that turned push is becoming more of a kick now.

      I have asked to go OOB nightly and gotten it and you know it does make life in 3D easier for a while. What is weird though is that I became bored of going OOB! LOL I don’t usually go to cool planets or other worlds like I once did, though. I typically end up in some world made just for me and then can’t leave. My guides make sure that when I am OOB it is not super exciting like it once was and if it is exciting it is only once in a blue moon. They know me too well. Even when I have tried to stay OOB it doesn’t work and I am sucked back into my body with a vengeance and some major vertigo. I am so glad for the brief reprieves I have been granted, though. I don’t know how I spent the first 26 years of my life oblivious to the astral realms and other spiritual experiences.

      Like

  5. etherealbeingsinmylife says:

    I always enjoy your posts. I find them interesting and illuminating. Although I realize that these signs and messages are for you, they often resonate with me. I find them helpful. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

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