I struggled to fall asleep yet again last night. I was concerned I would miss something important. I could feel that something was going on and I knew I was not to be allowed to remember it. I did not like that!
Often I would begin to fall into the in-between and felt to be carried away gently into the unknown. It was similar to falling to sleep except that I could feel my assistants encouraging me to come with them. But I wanted to know what was happening so each time I would wake up.
I heard my Companion say to me, “Ask for help”. So I did. I said, “Please help me. I want to sleep. I want to know what is going on”. And I soon fell asleep.
Dream: A Whole New World
I was with an older woman and a few others. We were preparing for a ceremony where we reenacted a wedding. It was like a renewal of vows but there were no vows. Instead, I was to sing the song I sang at the original wedding – my wedding.
I heard the music and the woman and I went over it. It was the song Let it Go. It had some difficult parts and I said, “I don’t think I can do those parts. I don’t remember those being there before”. She said, “You are right. Let me find the original music”.
She returned with the original music and showed me the original wedding invitations as well. She had a pile of them. They were baby blue in color with snowflakes on them.
I said, “You always keep things like that! You are awesome!”
Then the time came for me to sing. I walked up in front of a huge group of people. A was told to stand in front of the monitor which projected the words to the music for me to read. But I already knew the words.
The music started but I chose not to sing at the last minute. Yet I heard myself singing anyway. I sounded so beautiful, like an angel singing!
I watched the crowd of people and saw many faces I recognized. They were all crying from the beauty of it. I heard the words from Disney’s Let it Go but I also heard words from another Disney song – from Aladdin, A Whole New World. They mixed together like the same song and everyone was crying such happy tears.
I awoke in tears. The feeling I had was a mixture of happiness and sadness. I don’t understand it even now. The lyrics to A Whole New World were going over and over in my head while at the same time I was hearing, “Let it go”.
I suspect that I am holding onto something which is getting in the way of movement forward, movement toward my true purpose for being here. I am holding onto this part I have been playing this whole life. It’s time to stop being the “actress” and to be who I came here to be. No wonder I am sad.