After yesterday’s sudden memory of dreamtime work, I found myself struggling with massive heart chakra fluctuations. I would go from feeling normal to suddenly being very emotional. I busied myself baking Christmas cookies for most of the day to avoid it, but there was always a feeling that my attention was needed elsewhere. There came with it an urge to sit at the computer and write, but I was afraid of what would come out.
Night Brings Memory
I desperately wanted to sleep and wake to a new day, but it seems that was not meant to be. I tossed and turned for a good three hours before I finally slept. In that time I would often slip into the in-between; on the edge of sleep and wakefulness. It was like when I crossed that “line” there was a floodgate opened and all that transpired previously – my “other” work – would return.
The memories would wake me up with a start and I would ask they be removed and they would. Yet some remained, enough for me to feel the urgency behind them and the prompting from my Team to allow these memories to remain.
Thankfully, I fell asleep and do not recall much of my dreams. I do remember once again being a teacher of children, this time high school aged. I felt very calm and composed despite their misbehavior. It is like I transformed into a much wiser, more patient guide to them compared to my actual time teaching in the physical.
I awoke much too early for my liking – 5:30. I felt immediately the presence of my Team. One was close and persistent. I would fall into the in-between and it seemed like he would slip into my consciousness symbols and memories. One such symbols I saw looked like a large pecan. I thought, “pecan” and was corrected by him – “chromosome”. I recognized the similarity and almost laughed but then got upset because I knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to get me to remember something and I was set against it.
Another memory came to me in a very detailed image of blueprints. They appeared to be blueprints for the building of some kind of machine. It was curious and I knew it belonged to a type of aircraft and that part of the blueprints included the platform on which it would land. I was curious but then again pushed it away as if yelling, “No!” Yet the memory remains solid in my mind even now.
As I tried to settle into my heart center I felt this assistant nearby. I received communication from him on behalf of my Team. “We want you to Remember. It is of the utmost importance”.
I do want to, but then I don’t. I am conflicted.
I received communication that I would Remember. I was told I would be “visited”. I am not sure what that means nor do I really care. I can request it be saved in my subconscious to be remembered later.
Though I do not open the doors to the full communication, I can feel what it is They want me to do. They want me to fully accept what I Know and am Remembering. This includes sharing it with others. The reason I feel urged to write is to share what I am experiencing and Remembering. This is part of my mission here. It is meant to be more involved than I am allowing it to be.
I have a strong draw to connect with others like myself. At first I was just reading other blogs and websites and perusing Facebook. Now, though, I am feeling a strong urge to connect with certain groups and people – meaning send them emails or telephone them. I resist, though, because to connect with these group and people means I am accepting my experiences and knowingness fully. I am not sure I am there yet. Some of these groups and people are very “out there” in their beliefs and experiences. There are contactees, abductees, Starseeds, channelers, and others. I am drawn to them very strongly. I feel like I have to talk to them, but about what I have no idea.
Shifting into Alternate Dimensions
I wanted to add one more thing before I forget again. The reason I am struggling to fall asleep is that as I slip into the in-between I feel a strangeness come over me. It is an odd feeling that I cannot describe and it unsettles me. It reminds me of previous experiences I have had where I feel that pieces of me are leaving or returning. It scares me but really I should not be scared. When I feel this fear my Ego driven consciousness awakens and the feeling subsides. But it returns as soon as I near sleep.
I am told I am shifting into alternate dimensions. I cross over the veil or whatever it is that divides this world from the next. The feeling is my energy body moving out of my physical body but not in the way that is usual with an OBE. There are no vibrations like with OBE. It is subtler and hard for me to understand. It has to do with a new ability I have not fully awakened to (I am doing it but it has not fully integrated with this consciousness yet) and the crystalline body is involved.
When I shift is when the memories come flooding in. I feel different when this happens. Like I am me but I am not me. I suspect this feeling is my Companion taking the pilot seat and me stepping back. Except that I don’t step back. I freak out when the Knowingness and the strange feeling takes over.
I will say that the urges I am feeling to connect with others like myself and to speak up about what I am going through are getting stronger and stronger. I almost blurted out to my husband, “I am talking to aliens” but held back this morning because I was not ready to get into a long dialogue about it. But I suspect I will eventually blurt out something soon enough if this urgency, this prompting of such intensity, continues.
I know why I am so resistant. The urgency and the intensity of it scares me. I feel unable to control it and the things I Remember and experience. This creates fear and resistance from the Ego and is in the way. I am told I will “relinquish”. Probably. They are always right.