I didn’t go to sleep last night with the intention to astral – though I guess I really always have that intent – so, I will just say I went to bed without asking to astral.
At one point I began talking to my guide. I recalled a Facebook post from the previous day in which an artist told of his struggle with depression and explained how he overcame it by finding his life’s purpose and focusing upon that. I remember asking, “What is my purpose?” and knowing instantly, as I always do, that I am here to “help”. I always immediately asked, “How?” and feel lost in that I have never had a strong knowingness in exactly what kind of help I am here to give. Feeling once again hopeless of ever finding the intense desire and motivation to help that I envy others having of their personal life purpose, I fell asleep. It was around 6:30am and I was laying on my back.
I soon found myself in the midst of a dream. I was semi-lucid and for a while I struggled with maintaining even a small amount of awareness. This struggle showed itself by causing aspects of the dream to seem hazy while other parts were crystal clear.
The first part of the dream was set in a hotel. I was waking up and remember going to the bathroom momentarily and wrapping a towel around me as I left and went to join the rest of my family. This part of the dream is difficult to remember in full because I kept gaining and losing awareness. It is like the dream “flashed” in and out like a strobe light, with parts being more illuminated than others.
I walked into the hotel bedroom and saw my Mom and my two oldest children. There was a table and I sat down and noticed my sister and her husband (my cousin) and their baby were there as well. I don’t remember everything we talked about but I do recall that my cousin asked me at once point about a man I use to know. In the dream I told him, “He should be a minister and not a teacher”. In reality, this man is both a teacher and a minister.
At this point the dream fades out some and I am aware that I am walking back to the bathroom. I realized on the way the reason why I was struggling to see, thinking to myself, “I never washed my face”. I went into the bathroom in order to do this but the dream again fades out.
The next thing I remember is walking along a sidewalk outside the hotel and being greeted by smiling strangers. I began very conscious of being in my towel because I had reached in to pull off my bra and then changed my mind and left it on, worrying someone would see.
I went inside the hotel and waited with a bunch of young people. I felt very inappropriate standing there in a towel so avoided eye contact with them. The elevator opened and a woman rushed inside and I waited for my turn. The elevator was full but I remember saying, “I think there is room for more” and I went in.
Inside the elevator there were children, mostly pre-teen aged. I remember being very worried about my room number – I couldn’t remember it. At first I thought it was 427, then thought it might be 627. When the woman asked me what floor I told her, “I’m not sure. 4”, and saw her push the button on the elevator. I noticed there were only 6 floors total and wondered if I was wrong about my room number. The woman told me, “I forget my number all the time” acting as if it were completely normal to forget.
Once again I blacked out and when I could recall what was going on again I found myself outside with my two children. We were going to a school and I remember thinking the school was not safe and stopping outside of it with my children. I remember feeling the urge to fly and not being sure if I was dreaming or not. As if to prove I was dreaming, I looked to the retaining wall outside the school and saw it crumble before my eyes, revealing a miniature, blue bulldozer.
I turned and looked at my children and had the idea to fly. I leaped up into the air and only succeeded at jumping high. When I landed, though, I could feel the pebbles beneath my feet as they poked at my bare feet. This convinced me that I must be on the right track. I tried again, this time aiming at going over a chain link fence, but fell short again. This did not deter me, though, and I grabbed my son and daughter by the hand and said, “Let’s fly! I will show you!” I jumped with them and we succeeded.
Once in the air my vision became crystal clear and I was very certain that I was OOB. I looked down and around below me and saw that where the school building was suppose to be was a crystal, blue shimmering lake. It seemed unreal, though, almost as if it were made out of glass or some other material. To my left I saw the treetops and was overwhelmed by the vastness above and around me. I felt free and exhilarated as well. The emotional overwhelm blacked out my vision and I remember thinking that I wanted to keep seeing so I said, “Clarity now”, and focused on feeling the arms of my two little ones who were flying with me.
I guess I did something right because there was a shimmering of the scene around me as it went from dull grays and browns to vivid color. As my vision returned, the scene shifted and I found myself flying alone over city streets I did not recognize. It was like I went back in time to the 1950’s because the cars were all shiny, older models with the rounded headlights and car bodies. The streets reminded me of a small 1950’s town because the store fronts were reminiscent of the Back to the Future movie. My ears were flooded with music as well. The song, “Come Monday” by Jimmy Buffet was playing and I was singing along.
I flew along the sides of the cars as they traveled through the intersection below me. I reached for the door handles, hoping to hitch a ride inside of one. I could never quite catch up to one in order to grip the door handle and soon gave up, moving toward oncoming traffic for a moment and then changing my mind as I hovered in the intersection.
A big, blue bus came towards me and I got the idea to grab onto it. I thought at first it was a trolley but when I grabbed onto its railing the railing moved and it appeared to be a large, blue blade of some sort similar to a helicopter blade. I kept hold of it and it swung out and about. At one point it took me by the driver’s window and he smiled at me. It was like the metal blade thing I was on was flowing like a long ribbon.
The bus took me with it down a road into a more rural area. I watched the scenery around me change and just enjoyed the ride. The entire time I could hear the Jimmy Buffet song playing around me and I was singing along. However, instead of singing, “Come Monday”, I would sing, “Come Thursday” or “Come Sunday”. I remember thinking to myself, “I need to remember this”.
As I flew along, I realized I was no long with the bus. I looked up to see what I was holding onto and saw that I was hanging from a cluster of white balloons. I remember smiling and just feeling glee as I flew along and looked at the countryside below. It was a nice feeling.
Then I noticed that I was flying over a cemetery. The front gate had a large bed mattress on top. The mattress was light gray and was very obvious. I wondered about it as I hovered over it and then noticed someone walking toward me and the cemetery. As I looked down I became frightened because the man was completely black. I recognized him to be a shadow person and just looking at him made me feel fear in the pit of my stomach. He was tall and had what appeared to be a crown on his head, though it was all black and I could not make out where the crown started and the head ended.
Feeling the fear triggered something in me and rather than retreat from the man, I flew toward him yelling at him something that I cannot remember now. My intent was to make him disappear and to confront the fear that created him. Unfortunately, the fear must have been too much and as I drew closer and close to him I woke up.